I have to chime in that it's a bad idea to turn off these updates. These "tools" are frequently found to have security holes that can result in a compromised workstation. Many times, the purpose of these updates is to secure a hole that has been found. Why would you want to turn them off?
If your machine is so fragile that it can't handle the very small "update checkers" running...then you have much larger issues to contend with.