gregrocker: I called HP and all that jazz and they want me to send it in for a fee, but frankly I'd rather let the thing die given all the trouble it's given me in the past year. I know it's not the monitor because I've seen the monitor come on on a couple of occasions but since it can't access the BIOS or HDD, it goes black. Also, if it were the monitor, then I would get a light from the caps or num lock when I press them at the log-in screen, but there's no response.
The HDD light doesn't go on, but that's because the POST never finishes, so the harddrive is never accessed (I am assuming)
Torrentula: yeah, i tried that and didn't work
alphanumeric: The two blinks is an error code indicating a corrupt BIOS. Because of my lack of options, flashing the BIOS seems to be the only method i have to fall back on right now, unless anyone has something I haven't tried yet.