BSODs and general mayhem

I honestly don't know if memtest will run from a usb, I've never tried.

The fact that almost all of them quote memory management while only a small handful point to the irq issue.
I'm leaning towards the memory management causing the interrupt request problems.
A quick sweep of your drivers found nothing known to cause constant debilitating bsod's.
Though I think you already know this.

Once again have you run the sfc check yet?
right now I'd just like to get you where windows will function to some degree.

Well it's enough to suggest a problem though not a really bad one.
If you are feeling patient you can over the next couple of nights try removing one ram stick while you test the other.
If you find one that hits no errors try running with it for a bit to see if your problem is solved.