Jokes Thread


  1. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #1381

    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    THWolves thank you for this newer version..
    Let's see how it looks on the page now.
    I'm sure it's going to look really good.
    I just peeked after posting this .. looks Great!!!!

    Here's another one for you.
    Jokes Thread-heart.jpg

    So where's my e-mail?
      My Computer


  2. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #1382

    A doctor in Duluth wanted to get
    off work and go hunting, so he
    approached his assistant. 'Ole, I am goin' huntin' tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all my patients.'

    'Yes, sir!' answers Ole.

    The doctor goes hunting and returns
    the following day and asks: 'So, Ole,
    How was your day?'

    Ole told him that he took care of
    three patients. 'The first one had a
    headache so I gave him TYLENOL.'

    'Bravo, mate, and the second one?'
    asks the doctor.
    'The second one had stomach burning and I gave him
    MAALOX, sir,' says Ole.

    'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about
    the third one?' asks the Doctor.

    'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and
    a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself,

    taking off everything including her panties and lies
    down on the table and shouts: HELP ME - I haven't
    seen a man in over two years!!'

    'Tunderin' Lard Yeezus, Ole, what did you do?' asks the doctor.
    J
    'I put drops in her eyes!!
      My Computer


  3. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1383

    The Howling Wolves said:
    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    THWolves thank you for this newer version..
    Let's see how it looks on the page now.
    I'm sure it's going to look really good.
    I just peeked after posting this .. looks Great!!!!

    Here's another one for you.
    Jokes Thread-heart.jpg

    So where's my e-mail?
    THWolves hi.. some friend you are leaving me alone and deserted..lol.
    I did save the pic... thanks I think..lol
      My Computer


  4. Posts : 130
    Windows® 7 Home Basic 64bit, Build 7600
       #1384

    The Howling Wolves said:
    A doctor in Duluth wanted to get
    off work and go hunting, so he
    approached his assistant. 'Ole, I am goin' huntin' tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all my patients.'

    'Yes, sir!' answers Ole.

    The doctor goes hunting and returns
    the following day and asks: 'So, Ole,
    How was your day?'

    Ole told him that he took care of
    three patients. 'The first one had a
    headache so I gave him TYLENOL.'

    'Bravo, mate, and the second one?'
    asks the doctor.
    'The second one had stomach burning and I gave him
    MAALOX, sir,' says Ole.

    'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about
    the third one?' asks the Doctor.

    'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opens and
    a woman enters. Like a flame, she undresses herself,

    taking off everything including her panties and lies
    down on the table and shouts: HELP ME - I haven't
    seen a man in over two years!!'

    'Tunderin' Lard Yeezus, Ole, what did you do?' asks the doctor.
    J
    'I put drops in her eyes!!
      My Computer


  5. Posts : 7,781
    Win 7 32 Home Premium, Win 7 64 Pro, Win 8.1, Win 10
       #1385

    A Guy Fairy Tale


    Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess... “Will you marry me?”

    The Princess said “NO!”

    And the Prince rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf and dated women half his age and drank beer and scotch and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted, and lived happily ever after.

    The End
      My Computer


  6. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #1386

    This is the first warning I have seen for men.

    A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular Lowe's or Home Depot customers. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

    Here's how the scam works:

    Two seriously good-looking 20-something girls come over to your car as you are packing your trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say, 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to McDonald's.

    You agree and they get into the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you while the other one steals your wallet.

    I had my wallet stolen May 7th, 9th, 10th, 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also June 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, twice already today and very likely again this upcoming 4th of July weekend.
      My Computer


  7. Posts : 17,322
    Win 10 Pro x64
       #1387

    The Howling Wolves said:
    This is the first warning I have seen for men.

    A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular Lowe's or Home Depot customers. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

    Here's how the scam works:

    Two seriously good-looking 20-something girls come over to your car as you are packing your trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say, 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to McDonald's.

    You agree and they get into the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you while the other one steals your wallet.

    I had my wallet stolen May 7th, 9th, 10th, 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also June 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, twice already today and very likely again this upcoming 4th of July weekend.
      My Computer


  8. Posts : 3,300
    Win7 Home Premium 64x
       #1388

    awesome THW!
      My Computer


  9. Posts : 3,300
    Win7 Home Premium 64x
       #1389

    Borg 386 said:
    Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess... “Will you marry me?”

    The Princess said “NO!”

    And the Prince rode motorcycles and went fishing and hunting and played golf and dated women half his age and drank beer and scotch and had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted, and lived happily ever after.

    The End
    :)

    lived happily ever after Alone. which is great if you can do that.
      My Computer


  10. Posts : 6,857
    Win 7 Ultimate 64-bit SP1 (desktop)
       #1390

    The Howling Wolves said:
    This is the first warning I have seen for men.

    A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular Lowe's or Home Depot customers. Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.

    Here's how the scam works:

    Two seriously good-looking 20-something girls come over to your car as you are packing your trunk. They both start wiping your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. It is impossible not to look. When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say, 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to McDonald's.

    You agree and they get into the back seat. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and starts crawling all over you while the other one steals your wallet.

    I had my wallet stolen May 7th, 9th, 10th, 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also June 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, twice already today and very likely again this upcoming 4th of July weekend.
    Sounds like a reason to pick up a couple spare wallets!
      My Computer


 

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