Jokes Thread

Hellmann's Mayonnaise - a bit of history.

Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England . In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico . But as we know, the great ship did not make it to New York . The ship hit an iceberg and sank, and the cargo was forever lost. The people of Mexico, who were crazy about mayonnaise, and were eagerly awaiting its delivery, were disconsolate at the loss. Their anguish was so great, that they declared a National Day of Mourning, which they still observe to this day. The National Day of Mourning occurs each year on May 5th and is known, of course, as -

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Sinko De Mayo.

WHAT??? You expected something educational from me? You need a shot of Tequila after that don't you?

An Army ranger was deployed to Afghanistan. While he was there he received a letter from his girlfriend.
In the letter she explained that she had slept with two guys while he had been gone, she wanted to break
up and she wants pictures of herself back.

So the Ranger does what any squared away Ranger would do. He went around to his buddies and collected
all the unwanted photos of women he could find.

He then mailed about 25 pictures to his girlfriend with the following note:

"I'm sorry I can't remember which one you are, but please take the one that belongs to you and send the rest back. Thank you."

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

smarteyeball said:

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

nice find smarteyeball

smarteyeball said:

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

smarteyeball said:

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

smarteyeball said:

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

Oh ! Nice thing ! How could you managed it, pal ?

Arc said:

smarteyeball said:

johnwillyums said:

Stereotypes are hard to avoid in jokes I know

Tell me about it... stereo typing is not a laughing matter.

Oh ! Nice thing ! How could you managed it, pal ?

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