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Windows 7: Jokes Thread [3]

14 Dec 2011   #91
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Hopalong X View Post
THE RANSOM

A driver was stuck in a traffic jam on the highway outside Washington, D.C.. Nothing was moving. Suddenly, a man knocks on the window.

The driver rolls down the window and asks, “What’s going on?”

“Terrorists have kidnapped Congress, and they’re asking for a $100 million dollar ransom. Otherwise, they’re going to douse them all in gasoline and set them on fire. We’re going from car to car, collecting donations.”

“How much is everyone giving, on average?” the driver asks.

The man replies, “Roughly a gallon.”


AMEN.....

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by LADYPINKtomato1 View Post
I'll donate 2 gallons at least.. if you need more let me know .
My System SpecsSystem Spec
15 Dec 2011   #92
whs
Microsoft MVP

Vista, Windows7, Mint Mate, Zorin, Windows 8
 
 

Fastest Job interview ever


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Jokes Thread [3]-2011-12-13_2025.png 
My System SpecsSystem Spec
15 Dec 2011   #93
The Howling Wolves

Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
 
 

In the coming New Year, 2012, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address will occur on the same day.

This is an ironic juxtaposition of events.

One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to an insignificant creature of little intelligence for prognostication.

The other involves a groundhog.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
.

15 Dec 2011   #94
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by The Howling Wolves View Post
In the coming New Year, 2012, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address will occur on the same day.

This is an ironic juxtaposition of events.

One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to an insignificant creature of little intelligence for prognostication.

The other involves a groundhog.
Yep, the same Congress will be there.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Dec 2011   #95
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by whs View Post
Fastest Job interview ever
permalink

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16 Dec 2011   #96
pebbly

win 7 ultimate32bit, Win8.1pro wmc 32bit
 
 

I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving. As you know, some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years. The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends. After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I've never done before. Believe it or not, I took a bus home. Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I had never driven a bus before.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Dec 2011   #97
xxxdannyxxx

Windows 7 Home Premium x64 SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving. As you know, some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years. The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends. After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I've never done before. Believe it or not, I took a bus home. Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I had never driven a bus before.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Dec 2011   #98
The Howling Wolves

Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving. As you know, some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years. The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends. After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I've never done before. Believe it or not, I took a bus home. Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I had never driven a bus before.
Pebbly,
The only thing I have to add was that all the passenger's that were on board have been taken home safely as well. They arrived 3 days later as they they couldn't use the GPS to locate the bus.
Dennis
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Dec 2011   #99
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving. As you know, some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years. The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends. After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I've never done before. Believe it or not, I took a bus home. Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I had never driven a bus before.
The best of the year!!!!!!!!!!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Dec 2011   #100
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
I would like to share an experience with you, it has to do with drinking and driving. As you know, some of us have had brushes with the authorities over the years. The other night I was out for dinner with a few friends. After consuming too much wine, and knowing full well that I was wasted, I did something I've never done before. Believe it or not, I took a bus home. Yes, a bus. I arrived home safely and without incident. This was really a surprise to me since I had never driven a bus before.
F-1 Double decker at the Piccadilly. Beep! Beep!


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