Windows 7 Forums
Welcome to Windows 7 Forums. Our forum is dedicated to helping you find support and solutions for any problems regarding your Windows 7 PC be it Dell, HP, Acer, Asus or a custom build. We also provide an extensive Windows 7 tutorial section that covers a wide range of tips and tricks.


Windows 7: Jokes Thread [3]

21 Nov 2012   #1061

Windows 7 Pro x64 SP1
 
 

FWIW: The difference between a Fairy Tale and a Sea Story:

A fairy tale always begins: Once upon a time.

A sea story always begins: Now this is no S**T.

Rich
My System SpecsSystem Spec
21 Nov 2012   #1062
Microsoft MVP

Windows 7 Ultimate X64 SP1
 
 

You can always tell when someone is about to tell a lie, they begin with,
"To be honest" or,
"To tell you the truth..."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Nov 2012   #1063

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

Children in church

A Baptist pastor was presenting a children's sermon. During the sermon, he asked the children if they knew what the resurrection was. Now, asking questions during children's sermons is crucial, but at the same time, asking children questions in front of a congregation can also be very dangerous.


Having asked the children if they knew the meaning of the resurrection, a little boy raised his hand. The pastor called on him and the little boy said, "I know that if you have a resurrection that lasts more than four hours you are supposed to call the doctor."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
.


23 Nov 2012   #1064

Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
 
 

Oh god, Michael Winslow is too funny.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
29 Nov 2012   #1065

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

Windows 7 Home Premium x64 SP1
 
 

The Scottish Tourist

A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring " Run....Run!"

The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: " R-r-run ya bahstard, r-run will ya! "

A third batter hits a slam and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his knowledge of the game, screams " R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run will ya! "

The next batter steadfastly holds his swing four times and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up and yells " R-r-run ya bahstard, r-r-run! " All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment, whispers to the Scotsman, " He doesn't have to run, he's got four balls. "

After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, " Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!!!! "

A Guy
My System SpecsSystem Spec
29 Nov 2012   #1066

Windows 7 Home Premium x64
 
 



There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.

When asked to define "great" he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
29 Nov 2012   #1067

Windows 7 Pro x64 SP1
 
 

Saw this on G+ that really hit my funny bone.

A little, silver-haired lady calls her neighbor and says, "Please come over here and help me. I have a very difficult jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get started."

Her neighbor asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The little lady says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a rooster."

Her neighbor decides to go over and help her with the puzzle. When he arrives, the old lady shows him the puzzle spread out all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says:

"First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster." Then he takes her hand and says, "Secondly, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then..." and he says this with a deep sigh...




"Let's put all the Corn Flakes back in the box."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 Nov 2012   #1068

win 7 ultimate32bit, Win8.1pro wmc 32bit
 
 

A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt ................. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...
My System SpecsSystem Spec
01 Dec 2012   #1069

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

Windows 7 Home Premium x64 SP1
 
 

Gonna have to groan that one Kathryn

A Guy
My System SpecsSystem Spec
01 Dec 2012   #1070

Win7 64bit Ult
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt ................. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche...
O no ........ your really spoiling us
My System SpecsSystem Spec
Closed Thread

Thread Tools



Similar help and support threads for2: Jokes Thread [3]
Thread Forum
IT Jokes Chillout Room
Are age-related jokes past it? Chillout Room
Jokes Thread 2 Chillout Room
Jokes Thread Chillout Room
Jokes Thread Chillout Room

Our Sites

Site Links

About Us

Find Us

Windows 7 Forums is an independent web site and has not been authorized, sponsored, or otherwise approved by Microsoft Corporation. "Windows 7" and related materials are trademarks of Microsoft Corp.

© Designer Media Ltd

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:34 AM.
Twitter Facebook Google+



Windows 7 Forums

Seven Forums Android App Seven Forums IOS App
  

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33