| Windows 7: Jokes Thread [3] |
04 Feb 2013
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#1161 | | Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 32 bit/Windows 8 64bit Pembrokeshire, South Wales, UK |
 Would I | My System Specs |
| Computer type PC/Desktop System Manufacturer/Model Number Zoostorm Desktop/ Asus K55A Notebook PC OS Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 32 bit/Windows 8 64bit CPU Intel Core 2 Duo E4600 @ 2400 MHz/Intel B820,1.7GHz Motherboard Foxconn 45CMX/45GMX/45CMX-K/Asus Memory 2048 MB (2 x 1024 DDR2-SDRAM)/8GB 2 x 4GB DDR3 Graphics Card Intel Corp 82945G Integrated Graphics Controller/Intel Sound Card Onboard Realtek/Onboard Monitor(s) Displays Hanns.G HH221 22" inches Widescreen/Asus 15.6 Screen Resolution 1920 x 1080/1366 x 768 Keyboard Microsoft Natural Ergonomic Keyboard 4000 (UK)/Inbuilt Mouse Microsoft Optical Wheel Mouse/Touchpad Hard Drives ExcelStor (250GB)/Asus Internet Speed Just under 4MB download it's ADSL. Antivirus MSE/MSE Browser IE10/IE10 Other Info Epson Stylus SX415 All-in-one Printer,
Seagate Expansion 500GB External Desktop Drive
USB2 HDD Enclosure |
04 Feb 2013
|
#1162 | | win 7 ultimate nottingham |
Live life to the full Joan | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number self build OS win 7 ultimate CPU amd phenom x4 9600 Motherboard asus m2n32-sli deluxe Memory corsair twinxs 2x2gb Graphics Card 2x nvidia 1gb 8500gt Sound Card onboard Monitor(s) Displays 19" lg ring tft PSU oryxx tornado 750w Case thermaltake xaser lll Cooling artic freezer64 pro + 7 case fans Hard Drives maxtor sata 500gb
maxtor sata 320gb
fujitsu sata200gb |
04 Feb 2013
|
#1163 | | Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 32 bit/Windows 8 64bit Pembrokeshire, South Wales, UK |
| My System Specs | | Computer type PC/Desktop System Manufacturer/Model Number Zoostorm Desktop/ Asus K55A Notebook PC OS Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 32 bit/Windows 8 64bit CPU Intel Core 2 Duo E4600 @ 2400 MHz/Intel B820,1.7GHz Motherboard Foxconn 45CMX/45GMX/45CMX-K/Asus Memory 2048 MB (2 x 1024 DDR2-SDRAM)/8GB 2 x 4GB DDR3 Graphics Card Intel Corp 82945G Integrated Graphics Controller/Intel Sound Card Onboard Realtek/Onboard Monitor(s) Displays Hanns.G HH221 22" inches Widescreen/Asus 15.6 Screen Resolution 1920 x 1080/1366 x 768 Keyboard Microsoft Natural Ergonomic Keyboard 4000 (UK)/Inbuilt Mouse Microsoft Optical Wheel Mouse/Touchpad Hard Drives ExcelStor (250GB)/Asus Internet Speed Just under 4MB download it's ADSL. Antivirus MSE/MSE Browser IE10/IE10 Other Info Epson Stylus SX415 All-in-one Printer,
Seagate Expansion 500GB External Desktop Drive
USB2 HDD Enclosure |
04 Feb 2013
|
#1164 | | Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit California |

Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly Live life to the full Joan 
Pebbly and Joan you both qualify on being full of life and other things!  
THW | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number HP M9077c OS Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit CPU Intel(R)Core(TM)2 quad Q6600@2.4GHz 2.39GHz Motherboard ASUSeK Memory 6GB DDR2 6400 Graphics Card GeForce 8500/512MB Sound Card Realtek High Def Audio Monitor(s) Displays HP w2408 LCD 24" widescreen Screen Resolution 1920x1200 Keyboard MS wireless Inteli Mouse MS wireless Inteli Cooling 6 pack of Bud |
04 Feb 2013
|
#1165 | | Windows 7 HP 64bit, Windows 8 Pro w/Media Center 64bit Covington, La |
Jim | My System Specs | | Computer type PC/Desktop System Manufacturer/Model Number Home Built OS Windows 7 HP 64bit, Windows 8 Pro w/Media Center 64bit CPU Phenom II X6 1100T Motherboard ASUS M5A99X EVO Memory Crucial Balistic 8gb DDR3-1866 CL9 Graphics Card MSI R6850 Cyclone IGD5 PE Sound Card On Board Monitor(s) Displays ASUS VE258Q 25" LED with DVI-HDMI-DisplayPort Screen Resolution 1920 x 1080 Keyboard Logitech K120 Mouse Logitech Marble Mouse USB, Logitech Precision Game Pad PSU Seasonic X650 80 Plus GOLD Modular Case Corsair 400R Cooling Antec Kuhler H2O 620, Two 120mm and four 140mm Hard Drives Two WD Cavier Black 2TB Sata III, WD My Book Essential 2TB USB 3.0 Internet Speed 15MB Antivirus Norton IS 2012, Malwarebytes Pro Browser IE-10, FF-19 Other Info APC UPS ES 750, Netgear WNR3500L Gigabit & Wireless N Router with SamKnows Test Program, Motorola SB6120 Gigabit Cable Modem. Brother HL-2170W Laser Printer, Epson V300 Scanner |
06 Feb 2013
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#1166 | | Windows 7 SP1 (x86) Ultimate |
A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to
kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and
told him, I've kidnapped you.
She then wrote a note saying, I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning,
put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide
on the north side of the playground.
Signed, A Blonde.
The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to
show it to his parents. The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough,
a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The Blonde opened the bag and
found the $10,000 with a note that said, How could you do this to a fellow
Blonde? | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number Dell Studio 1555 OS Windows 7 SP1 (x86) Ultimate CPU Intel Core 2 Duo CPU P8600 @ 2.40GHz Motherboard Intel Cantiga PM45 Memory DDR2 3GB Graphics Card ATI Mobility Radeon HD 4570 Sound Card ATI High Definition Audio Device Monitor(s) Displays 15.6" Laptop Display Screen Resolution 1366*768 Hard Drives Seagate 500GB Internet Speed Dial Up 56kbps |
07 Feb 2013
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#1167 | | Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit California |
After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.
Now ... I have a $250,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 73-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."
My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.
Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems! | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number HP M9077c OS Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit CPU Intel(R)Core(TM)2 quad Q6600@2.4GHz 2.39GHz Motherboard ASUSeK Memory 6GB DDR2 6400 Graphics Card GeForce 8500/512MB Sound Card Realtek High Def Audio Monitor(s) Displays HP w2408 LCD 24" widescreen Screen Resolution 1920x1200 Keyboard MS wireless Inteli Mouse MS wireless Inteli Cooling 6 pack of Bud |
08 Feb 2013
|
#1168 | | Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600) Canberra, ACT |

Quote: Originally Posted by The Howling Wolves After being married for 50 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Fifty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.
Now ... I have a $250,000 home, a $45,000 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 73-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things."
My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.
Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems! | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number Hewlett-Packard OS Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600) Memory 4096MB RAM Graphics Card Radeon ATI HD4870 Monitor(s) Displays NVIDIA GeForce GT220 Screen Resolution 1680 x 1050 |
09 Feb 2013
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#1169 | | win 7 ultimate nottingham |
While in China, a man is very sexually promiscuous and does not use a condom all the time he is there.
A week after arriving back home in the States, he wakes one morning to find his organ is covered with bright green and purple spots.
Horrified, he immediately goes to see a doctor.
The doctor, never having seen anything like this before, orders some tests and tells the man to return in two days for the results.
The man returns a couple of days later and the doctor says, “I've got bad news for you, you've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare and almost unheard of here in the US, we know very little about it.”
The man looks a little perplexed and says, “Well, give me a shot or something and fix me up, Doc.”
The doctor answers, “I'm sorry, there's no known cure. We're going to have to amputate it”
The man screams in horror, “Absolutely not! I want a second opinion!!!”
The doctor replies, “Well, it's your choice. Go ahead, if you want but surgery is your only option.”
The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring that he'll know more about the disease.
The Chinese doctor examines his organ and proclaims, “Ah, yes, Mongolian VD. Vewy ware disease.”
The guy says to the doctor, “Yeah, yeah, I already know that but what can we do? My American doctor wants to cut it off !”
The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs. “Stupid American docttah, always want opawate. Make more money dat way. No need amputate!”
“Oh, thank God!”the man exclaims.
“Yes,”says the Chinese doctor, “Wait two week. Fawl off by itself!” | My System Specs | | System Manufacturer/Model Number self build OS win 7 ultimate CPU amd phenom x4 9600 Motherboard asus m2n32-sli deluxe Memory corsair twinxs 2x2gb Graphics Card 2x nvidia 1gb 8500gt Sound Card onboard Monitor(s) Displays 19" lg ring tft PSU oryxx tornado 750w Case thermaltake xaser lll Cooling artic freezer64 pro + 7 case fans Hard Drives maxtor sata 500gb
maxtor sata 320gb
fujitsu sata200gb |
09 Feb 2013
|
#1170 | | Win 7 Ultimate 64 bit At home. |
And Pebbly strikes again! | My System Specs | | Computer type PC/Desktop System Manufacturer/Model Number Custom Build OS Win 7 Ultimate 64 bit CPU Intel i7-3930K Motherboard ASUS P9X79 WS Memory Kingston HyperX Genesis 32GB Kit (8x4GB Modules) 1600MHz DDR Graphics Card MSI R7850 Twin Frozr 2GD5/OC Radeon HD 7850 2GB 256-bit GDDR Sound Card On board Realtek HD Monitor(s) Displays HP w2207h Screen Resolution 1680 x 1050 Keyboard Logitech G110 Mouse Logitech M525 (two in use) PSU Corsair HX750w Case Antec Two Hundred v2 Cooling Cooler Master GeminII S524 120mm (fan replaced with a 140mm) Hard Drives Samsun 128GB 840 Pro
Western Digital WD Black WD2002FAEX 2TB
Western Digital WD Black WD2001FASS-0 2TB Internet Speed fair to middlin' Antivirus AVAST!, MBAM, SAS, Spybot S&D (all but MBAM free) Browser IE10 Other Info LSI 9211-8i SATA III controller card (eight more SATA III ports), 2.5" & 3.5" Hot Swap Bays, HooToo HT-CR001 PCI-E to USB 3.0 Internal Combo - 3 Ports USB 3.0 Hub + 6 Slot Card Reader, and LG Model CH12LS28 BD-ROM Combo Optical Drive. Also, ScanSnap S1500 ADF duplexing scanner, Canon 9000F flat bed scanner, Logitech 5.1 speaker system, Samsung CLP 415nw laser color printer, Jokes Thread [3] problems? All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:06 AM. | |