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Windows 7: Jokes Thread [3]

01 Aug 2013   #1431
DocBrown

Win7 Enterprise, Win7 x86 (Ult 7600), Win7 x64 Ult 7600, TechNet RTM on AMD x64 (2.8Ghz)
 
 

That was Great!


Attached Images
Jokes Thread [3]-ha_ha_frog.gif 
My System SpecsSystem Spec
02 Aug 2013   #1432
COMPUTIAC

Windows 8.1.1 64bit
 
 

Question and Answer


A father and son went fishing one day. After a couple hours in the boat, the boy suddenly became curious about the world around him.


He asked his father, "How does this boat float"?


The father thought for a moment, then replied, "Don't rightly know, son."


The boy returned to his contemplation, then turned back to his father, "How do fish breathe underwater"?


Once again, the father replied, "Don't rightly know, son."


A little later, the boy asked his father, "Why is the sky blue"?


Again, the father replied, "Don't rightly know, son."


Worried he was going to annoy his father, he says, "Dad, do you mind me asking you all of these questions"?


"Of course not, son. If you don't ask questions, you'll never learn anything!"
My System SpecsSystem Spec
02 Aug 2013   #1433
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

" Theater Tickets For Seniors "

An old man lay sprawled across three entire seats in the theatre.

When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man,

"Sorry sir, but you're only allowed one seat."
The old man just groaned but didn't budge.

The usher became more impatient.
"Sir, if you don't get up from there I'm going to have to call the manager."

Once again, the old man just groaned.

The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment he returned with the manager.
Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the disheveled man, but with no success.

Finally they summoned the police.

The officer surveyed the situation briefly then asked,

"All right buddy what's your name?"

"Fred," the old man moaned.

"Where ya from, Fred?" asked the police officer.

With terrible pain in his voice, and without moving a muscle, Fred replied,

"The balcony."

Why didn’t you say so?

He never asked.
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.

02 Aug 2013   #1434
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

thudpucker... GREAT Joke.. I loved it.. bring on more..
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03 Aug 2013   #1435
Dinesh

Windows® 8 Pro (64-bit)
 
 

Jokes Thread [3]-joke.jpg


My System SpecsSystem Spec
03 Aug 2013   #1436
BrightBlessings

Win7 Pro-64 Bit
 
 

A mother and her 5-year-old son were flying Qantas from Sydney to Auckland.
The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked,
“If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant.
So the little guy walks up to the galley and asks the flight attendant, “If big dogs have baby dogs,
and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The flight attendant responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me that?"
The boy said, "Yes, she did”.

"Well then, please tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Qantas always pulls out on time,
and ask her to explain that to you."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
03 Aug 2013   #1437
thudpucker

W-7 Home premium
 
 

This is from Last season.

20% OF THE U. OF ALABAMA PLAYERS HAVE BEEN ARRESTED DURING THE PAST YEAR
AND
THE JOKES ARE FLOWING:





____________________________________________________

A lady in Tuscaloosa calls 911. Hysterically, she says, 'Someone's just
broken into my house, and I think he's going to rob me!' The police
officer
says, 'We're really busy at the moment. Just get the guy's jersey number
and
we'll get back to you.'
____________________________________________________



Q: What is Nick Saban's biggest concern?

A: Does the NCAA still count bail money as a recruiting violation?
____________________________________________________



Q: What do you call a drug ring in Tuscaloosa?

A: A huddle
_______________________________ _____________________



Q: Four Bama players in a car, who's driving?

A: The police
____________________________________________________



Q: Why can't most of the Bama players get into a huddle on the field?

A: It is a parole violation to associate with known felons.
____________________________________________________



The Bama team has adopted a new Honor System.

'Yes, your Honor; No, your Honor'.
____________________________________________________



The Tide is expecting a 7-6 season this year.
7 Arrests, 6 convictions.
____________________________________________________



Q: How will the Tide spend the first week of Spring Training?

A: Studying their Miranda Rights
My System SpecsSystem Spec
03 Aug 2013   #1438
Layback Bear

Windows 7 Pro. 64/SP-1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BrightBlessings View Post
A mother and her 5-year-old son were flying Qantas from Sydney to Auckland.
The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked,
“If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant.
So the little guy walks up to the galley and asks the flight attendant, “If big dogs have baby dogs,
and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The flight attendant responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me that?"
The boy said, "Yes, she did”.

"Well then, please tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Qantas always pulls out on time,
and ask her to explain that to you."
I want to hear the answer the mother gives explaining that.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
03 Aug 2013   #1439
thudpucker

W-7 Home premium
 
 

A Ronald Reagan Joke.

A farmer had some bad bottom land and decided to clean it up and make it grow some stuff.
So he worked and got it all going.
One Sunday after the morning church the farmer asked the Preacher to come by and look.

The Preacher was really impressed. Such big Tomatoes, and look at that tall Corn...such a Heavenly place.
The Farmer said to the Preacher: "You should have seen it before, when God was doing it all by himself!"
My System SpecsSystem Spec
04 Aug 2013   #1440
ThrashZone

Win-7-Pro64bit 7-H-Prem-64bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Layback Bear View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BrightBlessings View Post
A mother and her 5-year-old son were flying Qantas from Sydney to Auckland.
The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked,
“If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother, who couldn't think of an answer, told her son to ask the flight attendant.
So the little guy walks up to the galley and asks the flight attendant, “If big dogs have baby dogs,
and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The flight attendant responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me that?"
The boy said, "Yes, she did”.

"Well then, please tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Qantas always pulls out on time,
and ask her to explain that to you."
I want to hear the answer the mother gives explaining that.
+2 lol
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