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Windows 7: Jokes Thread [3]

14 Apr 2012   #421
seavixen32

Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 64-Bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Hopalong X View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BlackSparrow View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by seavixen32 View Post
I'd have been greedy. I'd have taken both!
She said anything you want right? so why not her money too?
SeaV

The joke was sent to me in an email from my brother.
It included a picture of the truck and Tammi.
You would have just taken the truck.


BlackSparrow

If he took her money how was she going to pay for the truck?
Mike, I've been down Singapore's Bugis Street at 3 am. I'd have taken Tammi!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Apr 2012   #422
BlackSparrow

Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Hopalong X View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BlackSparrow View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by seavixen32 View Post
I'd have been greedy. I'd have taken both!
She said anything you want right? so why not her money too?
SeaV

The joke was sent to me in an email from my brother.
It included a picture of the truck and Tammi.
You would have just taken the truck.


BlackSparrow

If he took her money how was she going to pay for the truck?

Good point there!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
15 Apr 2012   #423
Maguscreed

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

Windows 7 x64
 
 

A senior citizen drove his brand new Corvette convertible out of the dealership. Taking off down the road, he floored it to 80 mph, enjoying the wind blowing through what little gray hair he had left. "Amazing," he thought as he flew down I-95, pushing the pedal even more. Looking in his rear view mirror, he saw a Florida State trooper behind him, lights flashing and siren blaring. He floored it to 100 mph, then 110, then 120. Suddenly he thought, "What am I doing? I'm too old for this," and pulled over to await the trooper's arrival. Pulling in behind him, the trooper walked up to the Corvette, looked at his watch, and said, "Sir, my shift ends in 30 minutes. Today is Friday. If you can give me a reason for speeding that I've never heard before, I'll let you go."
The old gentleman paused. Then he said, "Years ago, my wife
ran off with a State trooper. I thought you were bringing her back."

"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
.

15 Apr 2012   #424
Kari

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Maguscreed View Post
...
"Have a good day, sir," replied the trooper.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Apr 2012   #425
Dinesh

Windows® 8 Pro (64-bit)
 
 

Reminder to all the Girls:
.
.
.
.
We always hear " the rules" From the female side

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered "1 " ON PURPOSE!

1 Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem ONLY if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both.

If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

1. IF IT ITCHES, IT will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle..

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.!! Really

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Cricket or Katrina's assets.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Apr 2012   #426
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

Three pressing questions:

How long you been married now, Dinesh?

How long did you expect to be married?

Am I mentioned in your will anywhere?
My System SpecsSystem Spec
16 Apr 2012   #427
BlackSparrow

Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Three pressing questions:

How long you been married now, Dinesh?

How long did you expect to be married?

Am I mentioned in your will anywhere?
I don't think he would put you in his will... he would put ALL OF US in his will... all for his money >
My System SpecsSystem Spec
17 Apr 2012   #428
BugMeister

Windows10 Pro - 64Bit vs.10547
 
 

- not sure if she'll read your list..
- simply too busy, multi-tasking.. (or whatever..!!)
My System SpecsSystem Spec
18 Apr 2012   #429
Dinesh

Windows® 8 Pro (64-bit)
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Three pressing questions:

How long you been married now, Dinesh?

How long did you expect to be married?

Am I mentioned in your will anywhere?
I have been happily married for 1 year and expecting it to last till my death. Oh, all my money goes to Bill & Melinda Trust.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
18 Apr 2012   #430
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

SEX is NOT the Answers to everything !!!.. NO matter what guys think.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
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