Jokes Thread [3]

Phone Man said:

Attachment 230006

Cajun heritage and damn proud of it.
Jim

Ummmmmm, this observation comes to you all from a Republican whose party just held a political convention of thousands of people on the Florida coast -- right in the middle of hurricaine season. . .

Hopalong X said:

Imperfect1 said:

Ummmmmm, this observation comes to you all from a Republican whose party just held a political convention of thousands of people on the Florida coast -- right in the middle of hurricaine season. . .

The hurricane didn't go to Tampa Bay where the convention was held.

It went to New Orleans again and caused flooding...again.

Yes, it's very, very sad that this particular hurricaine hit New Orleans, but my point was not about what happened with any specific hurricaine --- it was that it does not seem very smart to me, to hold a convention of thousands of people in the middle of an area that is vulnerable to major hurricaines, in the middle of hurricaine season. A hurricaine could have injured/killed
many people at and around the convention. They were very lucky one didn't.

Imperfect1 said:

Yes, it's very, very sad that this particular hurricaine hit New Orleans, but my point was not about what happened with any specific hurricaine --- it was that it does not seem very smart to me, to hold a convention of thousands of people in the middle of an area that is vulnerable to major hurricaines, in the middle of hurricaine season. A hurricaine could have injured/killed many people at and around the convention. They were very lucky one didn't.

So avoid planning any events anywhere along thousands of miles of coastline for two months out of every year? The chances of getting hit may be slimmer than you think. The chances of getting hurt are much less.

What about areas that see rather frequent tornados, earthquakes and such? Avoid them as well?

Phone Man said:

Tourism is a big part of the New Orleans economy and also for Florida. Hundreds of conventions in New Orleans during hurricane season. With hurricanes we get plenty of notice to get out of town. Its part of life and we deal with it.
Laissez les bons temps rouler (Let the Good Times Roll.)

Jim

It's rather hard not to be aware of it at least a couple of days ahead of time. As long as you haven't totally removed yourself from the rest of the world you're going to know about it in plenty of time. And then it's up to you as to what you're going to do about it.

Now let me go off and bubble-wrap myself...

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:

"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"