I fixed it.
I decided to see if my Ubuntu-Linux installation had anything to do with it (I have a dual-boot). Using the terminal I found that the WiFi card was detected (thus, not defective) but simply hardware disabled (via software, if that makes sense) by Ubuntu itself. I undid that, and Ubuntu connected wirelessley.
I booted into Windows and it instantly connected to my home network.
In case anyone is wondering, I got it all from here: http://askubuntu.com/questions/203562/wireless-disabled-by-hardware-switchanother
The difference is, unlike the guy in the above post, it worked for me.