i gave up with wmp a long time ago, i was sick of its constant freezes and updating the library so you had to wait for that before it would become responsive.
i gave up trying to fix it also .
my advice would be to use winamp for music and splash player for movies.
winamp can be customised with skins and looks far better than wmp,the only thing i miss with wmp is the album layout when choosing music. but it is a small loss in comparison to the lack of issues i get with winamp.
if you play flv files then i use vlc for that purpose only.