Hi there
This tutorial should cover both ends
The Virtual Machine is identical to a "Physical remote machine" so the instructions are identical.
Quick tutorial - secure remote login to your system with SSH | FOSSwire
This will show you how to get a TEXT based login. This is the easy part.
If you want a graphical login you'll need to have X running and start a VNC server on your box and use something like VNCVIEWER or tightVNC on Windows.
For file sharing between Linux systems and Windows you can use SAMBA quite straight forward and plenty of tutorials all over the web.
Cheers
jimbo