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Windows 7: Jokes Thread 2

30 May 2011   #1461
Bare Foot Kid
Microsoft MVP

W 7 64-bit Ultimate

Hello LPt, that's a good one!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1462

Windows 8 - 64-bit

Thank you BFK... glad you liked it also..
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1463

Windows 8 - 64-bit

The Spoon: A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization.

Last week, we took some friends to a new Indian restaurant, 'Muthu's Place,' and noticed that the Indian waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I observed that he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket. Then I looked around and saw that all the Indian staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I inquired, 'Why the spoon?'

'Well, 'he explained, 'the restaurant's owner hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all of our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour. If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now..' I was impressed.

I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the Indian waiter's fly.

Looking around, I saw that all of the Indian waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'

'Oh, certainly!' Then the Indian waiter lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also learned that we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our you-know-what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%.'

I asked quietly, 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'

'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'
My System SpecsSystem Spec

30 May 2011   #1464
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit

I will never touch a spoon in a restraunt ever again!

I am glad I never order the soup!

LPt you have now inherited the naughty step from Dennis and Pebbly!

The dungeon stairs at the bottom- now!
In the dark!

My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1465

Windows 7 Professional x64 SP1 ; Windows Server 2012 R2 Standard

Ohh my.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1466

Windows 8 - 64-bit

Mike ohhh noo.. I'll try to be better.... that just made me laugh out loud so I had to
bring the joke to the forum.. NO the devil did NOT make me post it.:
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1467
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit

Dennis made you do it right???

Blame it on him and he can sit in the dungeon.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
30 May 2011   #1468

Windows 8 - 64-bit

lol.... Mike not this time.. but the dungeon looked a bit frightening ..gimmie a stool and a pointed cap.. that, I can handle.:o
My System SpecsSystem Spec
31 May 2011   #1469

Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 64-Bit

Bubba spied a letter lying on the doormat. On the envelope was printed "Do Not Bend."

He spent the next two hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
31 May 2011   #1470
Layback Bear

Windows 10 Pro. 64/ version 1709 Windows 7 Pro/64

No spoons for me, I'm a fork person.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
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