Jokes Thread 2


  1. Posts : 132
    Windows 7 Ultimate 64 bit
       #1561

    Little Jill was not the best student on the Catholic school. She usually is sleeping in the class.

    On one day the teacher(A nun) asked little Jill, who was still sleeping, "Tell me Jill who created the universe?"

    Jill did not respond, tiny Willie, her boyfriend behind her, took his pencil and jabbed her in the side to wake her.

    "God Almighty!" shouted Jill.

    "Very good!" and the nun continued the lesson.

    Moments later the nun asked Jill, "Who is our Lord and Savior?"

    But Jill was already sleeping again. Willy saved her again by poking in her ass with his pencil.

    "Jesus Christ!" shouted Jill. And again the nun congratulated Jill with the good answer. And Jill slipped back into her dreams.


    The nun asked her for the third time a question: "What did Eve say to Adam after she had received her 21st child from him?"

    Willy saved her again but this time Jill jumped up and shouted:

    "If you stick that thing one more time in my hole, I break it in half!"

    After that the nun fainted .....
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  2. Posts : 7,730
    Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 64-Bit
       #1562

    smsff7, it's a play on words. "It's a long way to Tipperary" was a wartime song that was popular with British troops during the First World War during their time in the trenches.
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  3. Posts : 7,730
    Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 64-Bit
       #1563

    So as not to offend the Muslims in Britain the weather forecast will now be broadcast as the Muslim weather forecast in addition to the normal forecast.

    Makes sense really as most days here are partly Sunni and partly Shi-ite.
    Last edited by seavixen32; 04 Jul 2011 at 07:07.
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  4. Posts : 966
    Windows 7 Enterprise
       #1564

    Elephants


    How do you kill a grey elephant?
    Shoot it with a grey elephant gun.

    How do you kill a blue elephant?
    Shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

    How do you kill a red elephant?
    Tie a vine around its neck, wait for it to turn blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

    How do you kill a green elephant?
    Dont be silly. There's no such thing as green elephants.
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  5. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #1565

    xarden said:
    How do you kill a grey elephant?
    Shoot it with a grey elephant gun.

    How do you kill a blue elephant?
    Shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

    How do you kill a red elephant?
    Tie a vine around its neck, wait for it to turn blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

    How do you kill a green elephant?
    Dont be silly. There's no such thing as green elephants.

    xarden,

    Hope you didn't bet a lot of money that there are no green elephants....
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Jokes Thread 2-st-patrick-s-day-green-elephants-38854.jpg  
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  6. Posts : 966
    Windows 7 Enterprise
       #1566

    Shoot 'em with the green elephant gun then :P
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  7. Posts : 6,350
    Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
       #1567

    Go ahead make my day!

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  8. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1568

    Mike you drank too much PINK punch today.. when celebrating July 4th..
    You're now seeing Pink elephants..
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  9. Posts : 6,350
    Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
       #1569

    What pink elephant?

    I think you have been nipping the cooking sherry again LPt.
    Things will be better tomorrow. Go lie down now it has been a long day.
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  10. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #1570

    Mike,
    LPt doesn't nip at the cooking Sherry. She has an IV hooked up with it.
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