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Windows 7: Jokes Thread 2

09 Oct 2011   #1881
Athene

 

I am sometimes amazed at how sleazy some threads can turn in a forum which is supposed to be devoted to Windows 7 and where already 13-year-olds can sign up (and since it is obviously impossible to check the true age, it can be assumed that there are people well below that age participating over here). I thought that it was a general computer forum rule to keep the conversation clean - including in the chillout section. I apologise in advance if I offended anyone, but I had to express my surprise at the "grossness" level.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
09 Oct 2011   #1882
A Guy

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

Windows 7 Home Premium x64 SP1
 
 

It's not all out sleaze, to be sure. Some double entendre to be sure.. I certainly doubt a 13 year old isn't exposed to much more. We are mostly adults here, and this is the chillout room. The admins obviously think the thread is within guidelines. Sorry if we offended you, none of us are intentionally offensive. A Guy
My System SpecsSystem Spec
09 Oct 2011   #1883
seavixen32

Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 64-Bit
 
 

If ever you want to see a master class in double entendres, the series of Carry On films with Sid James & Co have no peer.

That said, I'm sure none of us had any intention to offend anyone so I apologise if we did.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
.

09 Oct 2011   #1884
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Why the thread is marked as solved?
My System SpecsSystem Spec
09 Oct 2011   #1885
arkhi

Windows 2000 5.0 Build 2195
 
 

One day...
I asked God for a bike.
But I know God doesn't work that way.


So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
10 Oct 2011   #1886
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by arkhi View Post
One day...
I asked God for a bike.
But I know God doesn't work that way.


So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
Good one!

I may do the same with a car.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
10 Oct 2011   #1887
Phone Man

Windows 8.1 Pro w/Media Center 64bit, Windows 7 HP 64bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by panais View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by arkhi View Post
One day...
I asked God for a bike.
But I know God doesn't work that way.


So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
Good one!

I may do the same with a car.
God may forgive you but the Law won't.

Jim
My System SpecsSystem Spec
10 Oct 2011   #1888
Phone Man

Windows 8.1 Pro w/Media Center 64bit, Windows 7 HP 64bit
 
 

You steal a bike and get caught and thrown in jail.
A big angry looking guy asks "what you in for?"
You say " Not much, just stole a bike"
He says. "So your the SOB that stole my little brothers bike!"

Jim
My System SpecsSystem Spec
10 Oct 2011   #1889
panais

Windows 7 Ultimate 64bit SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Phone Man View Post
You steal a bike and get caught and thrown in jail.
A big angry looking guy asks "what you in for?"
You say " Not much, just stole a bike"
He says. "So your the SOB that stole my little brothers bike!"

Jim
Oups!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
10 Oct 2011   #1890
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

Subject: Marriage
Once upon a time, a married couple celebrated their 25th marriage anniversary.
They had become famous in the city for not having a single conflict in the 25
years they had spent together.
Local newspaper editors had gathered at the occasion to find out the secret of
their well-known 'happy going marriage'.
Editor: 'Sir. It's amazingly unbelievable. How did you make this possible?

Husband recalling his old honeymoon days said: 'We went to Mexico for our
honeymoon. Having selected horse riding as the first activity, we both started
the ride on different horses.
My horse was okay but the horse on which my wife was riding seemed to be a crazy
one.
On the way ahead, that horse jumped suddenly, making my wife topple over.
Getting up from the ground, she patted the horse's back and said, 'This is your
first time'.
She climbed the horse and continued with the ride. After a while, it happened
again. She again kept calm and said 'This is your second time' and continued.
When the horse dropped her third time, she silently took out a revolver from her purse and shot the horse dead!!
I shouted at my wife: 'What did you do, you psycho. You killed the poor animal.
Are you crazy?'
She gave me a silent look, smiled and said: 'This is your first time!!!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
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