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Windows 7: Jokes Thread 2

06 Dec 2010   #541
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

Oh, my!


Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Dwarf View Post
Thank goodness for Duck Tape.

Attachment 121161
My System SpecsSystem Spec
06 Dec 2010   #542
Impulse Fire911

Windows 7 x64 Ultimate
 
 

Where does the general keep his "armies"













his "sleevsies"
:33333333333333333333333333
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06 Dec 2010   #543
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Impulse Fire911 View Post
Where does the general keep his "armies"...
Ban him! Ban him! Ban him!



(Just so you know, when someone my age lets out a horrendous groan, people are liable to drag you off to the hospital...)
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.

06 Dec 2010   #544
Impulse Fire911

Windows 7 x64 Ultimate
 
 

lol wait wat, did someone say the joke already or what?
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06 Dec 2010   #545
BrightBlessings

Win7 Pro-64 Bit
 
 

Once again this year, I've had requests for my Tequila Christmas Cake recipe, so here goes:
(Please keep in your files as I am beginning to get tired of typing this up every year!)


1 cup sugar

1 tsp baking powder

1 cup water

1 tsp. salt

1 cup brown sugar

Lemon juice

4 large eggs

Nuts

1 bottle tequila

2 cups dried fruit


Sample the tequila to check quality. Take a large bowl, check the tequila again to be sure it is of the highest quality.

Repeat.

Turn on the electric mixer. Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.

Add 1 teaspoon of sugar. Beat again.

At this point, it is best to make sure the tequila is still OK.

Try another cup just in case.

Turn off the mixerer thingy.

Break 2 eegs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.

Pick the fruit up off the floor.

Mix on the turner.

If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers, just pry it loose with a drewscriver.

Sample the tequila to test for tonsisticity.

Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something.

Check the tequila. Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.

Add one table. Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink. Whatever you can find.

Greash the oven.

Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.

Don't forget to beat off the turner.

Finally, throw the bowl through the window.

Finish the tequila and wipe the counter with the cat.


Cherry Mistmas

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07 Dec 2010   #546
Thorsen

Win7 Home Premium 64x
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Ban him! Ban him! Ban him!



(Just so you know, when someone my age lets out a horrendous groan, people are liable to drag you off to the hospital...)
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Impulse Fire911 View Post
lol wait wat, did someone say the joke already or what?


No it hadn't been posted before Profdlp is just having some fun with you. We aren't going to ban you just for posting that joke. It was just way to cheesy for him to not comment as such.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
07 Dec 2010   #547
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Impulse Fire911 View Post
Where does the general keep his "armies"...
Ban him! Ban him! Ban him!



(Just so you know, when someone my age lets out a horrendous groan, people are liable to drag you off to the hospital...)
That is for a second offense.

First offense is tar and feathers!!!
For his armies and his sleevsies!

Mike
My System SpecsSystem Spec
07 Dec 2010   #548
CarlTR6

Windows 7 Ultimate 32 bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Phone Man View Post
My bank called my wife last week and told her our checking account was overdrawn. She replied, it can't be I have 3 checks left.

Jim
Well, wasn't she right?
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07 Dec 2010   #549
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Thorsen View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Ban him! Ban him! Ban him!



(Just so you know, when someone my age lets out a horrendous groan, people are liable to drag you off to the hospital...)
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Impulse Fire911 View Post
lol wait wat, did someone say the joke already or what?


No it hadn't been posted before Profdlp is just having some fun with you. We aren't going to ban you just for posting that joke. It was just way to cheesy for him to not comment as such.
I'm STILL groaning over that joke.

(And can't wait to pull it on someone else.)
My System SpecsSystem Spec
07 Dec 2010   #550
Imperfect1

 
 

As we Silver Surfers know, sometimes we have trouble with our computers. I had a problem yesterday, so I called Eric, the 11 year old next door, whose bedroom looks like Mission Control and asked him to come over. Eric clicked a couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, "So, what was wrong?" He replied, "It was an ID ten T error." I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless inquired,
"An, ID ten T error? What's that? In case I need to fix it again." Eric grinned.... "Haven't you ever heard of an ID ten T error before?" "No," I replied.'"Write it down," he said, "and I think you'll figure it out."

So I wrote down:

ID10T
I used to like Eric, the little b*stard!
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