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Windows 7: Jokes Thread 2

21 Dec 2010   #641
BugMeister

Windows10 Pro - 64Bit vs.10547
 
 

Heather Mills' mum and dad have bought her a new leg for Christmas..

..it's not her main present, it's just a stocking-filler..


My System SpecsSystem Spec
21 Dec 2010   #642
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BugMeister View Post
Heather Mills' mum and dad have bought her a new leg for Christmas..

..it's not her main present, it's just a stocking-filler..


My System SpecsSystem Spec
21 Dec 2010   #643
The Howling Wolves

Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by profdlp View Post
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BugMeister View Post
Heather Mills' mum and dad have bought her a new leg for Christmas..

..it's not her main present, it's just a stocking-filler..


She probably didn't have a leg to stand on!
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.

21 Dec 2010   #644
Hopalong X

Windows7 Pro 64bit SP-1; Windows XP Pro 32bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by alfred01 View Post
Well I certainly can't top those one's, this one is dumb but:
A guy walks into his Doctor's office with a frog on his head, the Doctor says "What can I do for you?" and the frog says "Can you get this wart off my butt?"
That was funny because it was unexpected.

Mike
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21 Dec 2010   #645
Imperfect1

 
 

groan. . .
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22 Dec 2010   #646
jfar

Vista Ult64, Win7600
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by BugMeister View Post
Heather Mills' mum and dad have bought her a new leg for Christmas..

..it's not her main present, it's just a stocking-filler..


A few years ago Paul McCartney bought her a plane for christmas,


And Immac for the other leg.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Dec 2010   #647
pebbly

win 7 ultimate32bit, Win8.1pro wmc 32bit
 
 

A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams. Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette, are you?"
She says "No, I'm really a blonde".
"I thought so," he says. "You have a broken finger."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Dec 2010   #648
lorddenis

 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams. Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette, are you?"
She says "No, I'm really a blonde".
"I thought so," he says. "You have a broken finger."
You just cant hide your true colors
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Dec 2010   #649
jfar

Vista Ult64, Win7600
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by pebbly View Post
A young brunette goes into the doctor's office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
"Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."

She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams. Everywhere she touches makes her scream.

The doctor says, "You're not really a brunette, are you?"
She says "No, I'm really a blonde".
"I thought so," he says. "You have a broken finger."

Ouch.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Dec 2010   #650
johnwillyums

Windows 7 Home Premium 64 bit
 
 

A mother is making her son's bed one night when she finds a crumpled note under the pillow.
It's addressed to Father Christmas.
She thinks "Aw,that's really sweet" and opens the note:

Dear Father Christmas,

I know I said I wanted a bike but I've changed my mind
What I really want is clothes for all those poor children on Daddy's computer that don't have any.
Thanks, Richard.


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