Jokes Thread 2

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  1. Posts : 11,991
    Windows 7 Ultimate 32 bit
       #721

    The Howling Wolves said:
    > > Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women...

    And the Number One reason

    Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women.....


    #1 - You can buy a silencer for a gun!
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  2. Posts : 5,840
    Vista Ult64, Win7600
       #722

    DocBrown said:
    Hopalong X said:
    jfar stole my Sig.

    He couldn't even get the sig applied right.

    At least he didn't steal my horse.


    He must have fell off his horsegoat again!

    Jfar thinks that goat he rides is a Unicorn. He can't count to well!



    Doc don't look now but there is something very small, on your head
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  3. Posts : 9,537
    Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
       #723

    If you don't laugh at this one, you're not breathing…..

    A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed
    a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and
    a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

    The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet.

    The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.

    The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
    'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.

    'Thanks,' the girl replied. The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had
    tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.

    'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your
    rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go
    faster. '

    The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're probably right, but
    then I wouldn't have a siren."
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  4. Posts : 17,322
    Win 10 Pro x64
       #724

    The Howling Wolves said:
    If you don't laugh at this one, you're not breathing…..

    A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed
    a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and
    a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

    The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet.

    The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.

    The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
    'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.

    'Thanks,' the girl replied. The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had
    tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.

    'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your
    rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go
    faster. '

    The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're probably right, but
    then I wouldn't have a siren."
      My Computer


  5. Posts : 17,545
    Windows 10 Pro x64 EN-GB
       #725

    The Howling Wolves said:
    The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're probably right, but
    then I wouldn't have a siren."


    Some of you geeks were not born in 1973 when we had global energy crisis after OPEC closed the oil tabs for a while. Suddenly people, whole nations, had to save energy, and not only in third world. Also in western, rich developed countries all possible energy saving options were tried. In Scandinavian countries for instance most of the street lighting were turned off, shops, malls and department stores were forbidden to have lights in windows after closing time and so on.

    The Finnish police force had to save, too. So, in urban regions all patrol cars were replaced with tandem bicycles. That worked fine. When a patrol got an emergency call, they cycled to the place as fast as they could, the officer in front screaming "blue light, blue light, blue light..." and the officer on back seat "UUUaaaUUUaaaUUUaaa..."

    Kari
      My Computer


  6. Posts : 748
    Windows 7 32 bit
       #726

    The Howling Wolves said:
    If you don't laugh at this one, you're not breathing…..

    A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed
    a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and
    a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.

    The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet.

    The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.

    The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
    'That sure is a nice fire truck,' the firefighter said with admiration.

    'Thanks,' the girl replied. The firefighter looked a little closer. The girl had
    tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.

    'Little partner,' the firefighter said, 'I don't want to tell you how to run your
    rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go
    faster. '

    The little girl replied thoughtfully, 'You're probably right, but
    then I wouldn't have a siren."
    Serves the cat right, I hate them.
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  7. Posts : 834
    Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 x64
       #727

    andsome said:

    Serves the cat right, I hate them.
    Theres nothing wrong with cats, it just that they occasionally get annoying, but a lot of people are amused easily by their shenanigans.
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  8. Posts : 53,657
    Windows 10 Home x64
       #728

    andsome said:
    Serves the cat right, I hate them.
    Wow, harsh! I like cats, they just aren't dogs. Still, get one on your lap, and get it's engine purring...

    A Guy
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  9. Posts : 834
    Windows 7 Ultimate SP1 x64
       #729

    A Guy said:
    andsome said:
    Serves the cat right, I hate them.
    Wow, harsh! I like cats, they just aren't dogs. Still, get one on your lap, and get it's engine purring...

    A Guy
    +1 I'm a cat owner and a dog owner.
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  10. Posts : 748
    Windows 7 32 bit
       #730

    You should feed the cat to your dog.
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