Jokes Thread 2

Hopalong X said:

The World According to Palin

Paul Revere was really a British spy. A member of MI-1.0 predecessor of the famous MI-6.
Paul's famous ride was actually to warn the British the Americans were coming.

Aaron Burr was framed by Paul Revere for treason. That was a secret until you know who posted on Wikileaks.

More to come as soon as the astrologer consultation is over.

Rumor is that Betsy Ross was a KGB agent.

Sarah Palin fans try to rewrite history on Wikipedia - Computerworld

They will have to post it elsewhere.
Uncyclopedia

6 June 2011

Sarah Palin takes no responsibility for his thingy.


SEABROOK, New Hampshire -- Sarah Palin said Sunday she didn't mean to step on Mitt Romney's "thingy".

UnNews:Palin: I didn't mean to step on Romney's "thingy" - Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

I hope she didn't step on Paul Reveres "thingy".

Late one night, Jack took a short cut through a graveyard.
Hearing a tapping sound, he felt a little scared, but kept going. As the tapping grew louder, he became more frightened.
Finally, he found a man chiseling a gravestone.
"Thank goodness", Jack said to the man with relief. "You gave me quite a fright. What are you doing?"
"They spelled my name wrong", replied the man.

Welcome to Seven Forums omi08. A Guy

A Guy said:

Welcome to Seven Forums omi08. A Guy

Thanks A Guy! Appreciate your warm welcome buddy..:) I'm totally enjoying this thread, starter for the day at the office..

Sex and good grammar

On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife.

The certificate paid for a visit to a medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for erectile dysfunction.

After being persuaded, he drove to the reservation, handed his ticket to the medicine man and wondered what he was there for.

The old man handed a potion to him, and with a grip on his shoulder, warned, "This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful and then say “1-2-3. When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want."

The man was encouraged. As he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say 1-2-3-4,” he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon."

He was very eager to see if it worked so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom.

When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately, he was the manliest of men.

His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes and then she casually asked:

"What’s the 1-2-3 for?"

And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.

Thank you Borg, I need the laugh this mourning. I wonder if that shaman has a potion that works every sunrise instead of every full moon.

Bartender :
Guy goes in a bar, asks bartender for a "Bin Laden".
Barkeep says "what’s that?"
Dude says "two shots and a splash of water!"

LADYPINKtomato1 said:

Bartender :
Guy goes in a bar, asks bartender for a "Bin Laden".
Barkeep says "what’s that?"
Dude says "two shots and a splash of water!"