Chicago Bears- Muffins of the Midway

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  1. Woz
    Posts : 79
    Windows 7 Ultimate 64 Steve Ballmer Signature (jealous???)
       #1

    Chicago Bears- Muffins of the Midway


    An interesting article you won't read on ESPN.com

    CUTLER SACKED IN BYE-WEEK

    Hugh Jass
    Sportswriter


    Santa Claus, IN -

    The Chicago Bears offensive line showed improvement this bye-week, as quarterback Jay Cutler was sacked only three times on Sunday. The news is a bright spot for the Chicago Bears offensive line which gave up nine sacks in one half earlier this season.

    Jay was spending the weekend with his parents in Santa Claus, Indiana. “Jay was cutting vegetables, helping his mom in the kitchen,” said Jack Cutler, Jay’s father. “When all of a sudden, he just throws himself to the ground, nearly hitting his head on the kitchen table.” That was just the first sack of the day, however.

    Sandy Cutler, Jay’s mother, recalls, “We thought he was maybe having a diabetic reaction, but he told us he had taken his insulin.” Everything appeared to be going well for the next ten minutes until Jay threw himself down on the coffee table during a game of dominoes. “The coffee table broke into tiny pieces,.”, said Sandy. “After Jack revived him with smelling salts, we told Jay he should put on his helmet.”

    Thankfully, their Sunday dinner went through without incident. While helping his father clean the gutters on the house, however, Jay was sacked for a third time. Jack Cutler said, “I think the helmet probably saved his life on that one.” Fortunately for Jay, his parents live in a ranch-style house.

    The incidents stopped after that third sack. Jay appears to be doing well, although he is scheduled for a precautionary MRI to locate the missing domino tile.

    Jay was not available for comments.
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  2. Posts : 1,180
    Windows 7 Ultimate
       #2

    Being a Packer fan, I find this hilarious!!
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  3. Woz
    Posts : 79
    Windows 7 Ultimate 64 Steve Ballmer Signature (jealous???)
    Thread Starter
       #3

    Being a life-long Bears fan, I find this painfully accurate. I think I could run through the Bears offensive line.

    There's always next year...
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  4. Posts : 1,180
    Windows 7 Ultimate
       #4

    I am a Cubs fan, and that is a motto we live by :)
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  5. Posts : 4,751
    Windows 7 Home Premium 32-Bit - Build 7600 SP1
       #5

    Did those events really happen or is it just a story someone made up?
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  6. Woz
    Posts : 79
    Windows 7 Ultimate 64 Steve Ballmer Signature (jealous???)
    Thread Starter
       #6

    bigmck said:
    Did those events really happen or is it just a story someone made up?
    It's a totally fictitious story made up by me (a depressed Bears fan).
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  7. Posts : 4,751
    Windows 7 Home Premium 32-Bit - Build 7600 SP1
       #7

    Woz said:
    bigmck said:
    Did those events really happen or is it just a story someone made up?
    It's a totally fictitious story made up by me (a depressed Bears fan).
    I know how you feel. Matt Schaub spent most of Monday night on his back.
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  8. Posts : 1,797
    Windows 7 Ulti. x64
       #8

    Woz
    Great story. I myself a Cheifs fan. This year we have won more than lost. But nada on ESPN. We hear they are a fluke they don't or haven't played anybody bla bla. The Raiders this week-end now thats gonna be good!
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  9. Posts : 4,751
    Windows 7 Home Premium 32-Bit - Build 7600 SP1
       #9

    myzr7 said:
    Woz
    Great story. I myself a Cheifs fan. This year we have won more than lost. But nada on ESPN. We hear they are a fluke they don't or haven't played anybody bla bla. The Raiders this week-end now thats gonna be good!
    I just had a great idea for next football season. I am going to try and start a Fantasy League with just the guys on Sevens Forum. That would be fun.
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  10. Posts : 1,797
    Windows 7 Ulti. x64
       #10

    bigmck said:
    myzr7 said:
    Woz
    Great story. I myself a Cheifs fan. This year we have won more than lost. But nada on ESPN. We hear they are a fluke they don't or haven't played anybody bla bla. The Raiders this week-end now thats gonna be good!
    I just had a great idea for next football season. I am going to try and start a Fantasy League with just the guys on Sevens Forum. That would be fun.
    I'm in for that big mac, Think you can start one for the playoffs. My wife says that I would play fantasy jump roping if they had it
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