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Windows 7: Jokes Thread

13 Jul 2010   #1511
Kirsch

Windows 7 Ultimate
 
 

Classic detention slip!


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Jokes Thread-detention.png 
My System SpecsSystem Spec
13 Jul 2010   #1512
derekimo

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Kirsch View Post
One of my favorites
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Kirsch View Post
Another good one
Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Kirsch View Post
Classic detention slip!
Those are great Kirsch!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
13 Jul 2010   #1513
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

JOAN those are very good !!!.. thanks for sharing today.
My System SpecsSystem Spec
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13 Jul 2010   #1514
LADYPINKtomato1

Windows 8 - 64-bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Tews View Post
A first grade teacher collected well known proverbs. He gave each kid in the class the first half of the proverb,
and asked them to come up with the rest.
Here is what the kids came up with:

People in glass houses shouldn't . . . run around naked.

Better to be safe than . . . punch a 5th grader.

Strike while the . . . bug is close.

It's always darkest before . . . daylight savings time.

Never underestimate the power of . . . termites.

You can lead a horse to water but . . . how?

Don't bite the hand that . . . looks dirty.

No news is . . . impossible.

A miss is as good as a . . . Mr.

You can't teach an old dog . . . math.

If you lie down with dogs, you . . . will stink in the morning.

Love all, trust . . . me.

The pen is mightier than . . . the pigs.

An idle mind is . . . the best way to relax.

Where there is smoke, there is . . . pollution.

Happy is the bride who . . . gets all the presents.

A penny saved is . . . not much.

Two is company, three is . . . The Musketeers.

None are so blind as . . . Helen Keller.

Children should be seen and not . . . spanked or grounded.

If at first you don't succeed . . . get new batteries.

You get out of something what you . . . see pictured on the box.

When the blind lead the blind . . . get out of the way.

There is no fool like . . . Aunt Edie.
Tews hi.. Children just speak as they think.. this is so precious !!!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1515
Borg 386

Win 7 32 Home Premium, Win 7 64 Pro, Win 8.1, Win 10
 
 
30 harsh things a woman can say to a naked man

30 HARSH THINGS A WOMAN CAN SAY TO A NAKED MAN

1. I've smoked fatter joints than that.
2. Ohhhh, it's cute.
3. Why don't we just cuddle?
4. You know they have surgery to fix that.
5. Make it dance.
6. Can I paint a smiley face on it?
7. Wow, and your feet are so big.
8. It's OK, we'll work around it.
9. Will it squeak if I squeeze it?
10. Oh no... a flash headache.
11. (giggle and point)
12. Can I be honest with you?
13. How sweet, you brought incense.
14. This explains your car.
15. Maybe if we water it, it'll grow.
16. Why is God punishing me?
17. At least this won't take long.
18. I never saw one like that before.
19. But it still works, right?
20. It looks so unused.
21. Maybe it looks better in natural light.
22. Why don't we skip right to the cigarettes?
23. Are you cold?
24. If you get me real drunk first.
25. Is that an optical illusion?
26. What is that?
27. It's a good thing you have so many other talents.
28. Does it come with an air pump?
29. So this is why you're supposed to judge people on personality.
30. I guess this makes me the "early bird."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1516
severedsolo

Windows 7 Ultimate X64 SP1
 
 

you forgot one:

"So THATS why your supposed to go for personality"
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1517
mickey megabyte

ultimate 64 sp1
 
 

speaking from experience, martin?
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1518
Dinesh

Windows® 8 Pro (64-bit)
 
 

You forgot another one: Is it in??
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1519
severedsolo

Windows 7 Ultimate X64 SP1
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by mickey megabyte View Post
speaking from experience, martin?
A female friend of mine sent me a whole list of them years ago, thats the only one that sticks in my memory though
My System SpecsSystem Spec
14 Jul 2010   #1520
Arc

Microsoft Community Contributor Award Recipient

Microsoft Windows 10 Pro Insider Preview 64-bit
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by mickey megabyte View Post
speaking from experience, martin?
Same question came in my mind, too
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