New
#1111
Did you hear about the flasher who thought about retiring?
He decided to stick it out for another year
Related Joke:
Did you hear about the baker who thought about quiting?
He couldn't because he kneaded the dough.
Civic Lesson
In a high school civics class, they were discussing the qualifications for becoming President of the United States. The requirements are pretty simple. The candidate must be a natural born citizen and at least 35 years old.
A blonde girl in the class piped up and began complaining about how unfair it was to require the candidate to be a natural born citizen. In her opinion, that made it impossible for many qualified people to run for the office. She went on and on, wrapping up her argument with "What makes a natural born citizen more qualified to be President than one born by C-Section?"
I actually have a Christian computer joke......
Jesus and Satan were sitting around arguing about who was the best coder.
God appeared before them and said "I guess we'll have to decide this with a contest."
Two computers appeared before Jesus and Satan. God told them "You have 4 hours to write your code."
So Jesus and Satan began furiously coding. As the time went by, they both wrote lines and lines of code.
Suddenly, there was a flash in the sky and both computers went dead, then they rebooted. Several minutes later God yelled "STOP! Times up, lets see what you both have!"
Satan looked up and said "God, I have nothing...both our computers went dead and my code is gone."
God looked over at Jesus and said "And what do you have my son?"
Jesus hit the enter button and a beautiful screen saver came to life, filled with music and angels.
Satan's jaw dropped and he looked at the screen unbelieving. "HOW is this possible? We both lost power to our PC's"
God looked at Satan and chuckled as he said "Well, everyone knows...Jesus saves."
"There are 2 kinds of people in this world, those that save their data and those that wish they had"