Jokes Thread [3]


  1. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1241

    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    Texas bragger gets told off by Aussie‏

    A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie
    Farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the
    Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large".
    Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his
    Herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, " We have longhorns that
    Are at least twice as large as your cows".
    The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of Kangaroos
    hopping through the field. He asks, "And what are those"?
    The Aussie replies with an incredulous look,
    "Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas"?
    OH BURN! That's why you don't say **** to Aussies!
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  2. Posts : 53,669
    Windows 10 Home x64
    Thread Starter
       #1242

    Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside the operating room, the first surgeries of the day.

    The first kid leans over and asks, “What are you in here for?”

    The second kid says, “I’m getting my tonsils out, and I’m afraid.”

    The first kid says, “You’ve got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It’s a breeze.”

    The second kid then asks, “What are you here for?”

    The first kid says, “Circumcision.”

    “Whoa!” the second kid replies, “Good luck, buddy. I had that done when I was born. Couldn’t walk for a year.”

    A Guy
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  3. Posts : 25,847
    Windows 10 Pro. 64/ version 1709 Windows 7 Pro/64
       #1243

    Good one A Guy. I took me 6 months to walk.
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  4. Posts : 1,397
    Win 10 Pro 64
       #1244

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  5. Posts : 53,669
    Windows 10 Home x64
    Thread Starter
       #1245

    Gary said:


    A Guy
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  6. Posts : 25,847
    Windows 10 Pro. 64/ version 1709 Windows 7 Pro/64
       #1246

    You just have to remember that you have to find something to put a little Jack in and leave it for the Cottonmouth snake. If you don't he will follow you home.
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  7. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1247

    Gary said:
    Where's you find that? xD
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  8. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1248

    A random one liner.

    You can't even scare a puzzle to pieces!
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  9. Posts : 2,073
    Windows 10 Pro 64-Bit
       #1249

    Gary said:
    very nice
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  10. Posts : 2,578
    Vista 64 bit and 32 bit (SP2)
       #1250

    sk0t0s said:
    Gary said:
    very nice
    Yep! Don't know what it is about this story that makes me smile, but it does!!!
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