Jokes Thread [3]


  1. Posts : 506
    Windows 7 Ultimate x64
       #1271

    This was probably and hopefully the only time in my life I was going to wish there was a gay snowman in the kitchen
    OM* thank goodness it's at least another 6 months until the next snow fall giving me time to forget, because the next time I see a snowman, they are going to wonder who the lunatic is
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  2. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1272

    This came today from one of my Jewish friends in Canada

    " Problem Solved "

    The nice Jewish mother-in-law comes home and finds her son-in-law furious, and packing his suitcase

    What happened?? She asks.

    Eli screamed, "What happened? I'll tell you what happened!

    I sent an email to my wife saying that I was coming home from my trip today.


    I got home and guess what I found?


    My wife, yes my Rachel, your daughter, with a naked guy in our marital bed!


    This is the end of our marriage. I will leave forever!"

    "Calm down!" says mother-in-law. "There's something odd about this story.


    Rachel would never do such a thing!


    Wait a minute while I check what happened."

    Moments later, mother-in-law comes back with a big smile.


    "You see, I said that there must be a simple explanation.


    Rachel never received your email"!

    *********************************

    LOL..... now they have another problem !!!!!
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  3. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1273

    A CROWDED LIBRARY

    A guy is looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library.
    He asked a girl sitting alone at a table, 'Do you mind if I sit beside you?

    The girl replied in a very loud voice, 'I don't want to spend the night with
    you!'
    All the students in the library started staring at the guy, he was truly
    embarrassed and moved to another table.

    After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the guy's table and said
    with a laugh, 'I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking. I guess
    you felt embarrassed, right?'
    The guy then responded with a loud voice, '$500 for one night? ... That's too
    much!'

    All the people in the library looked at the girl in shock.

    The guy whispered in her ear, 'I study law, and I know how to screw people!'
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  4. Posts : 53,663
    Windows 10 Home x64
    Thread Starter
       #1274

    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    A CROWDED LIBRARY

    A guy is looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library.
    I honestly don't remember being in that library!

    A Guy
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  5. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1275

    A Guy said:
    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    A CROWDED LIBRARY

    A guy is looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library.
    I honestly don't remember being in that library!

    A Guy
    Maybe because it's been ages for you actually being in that library?
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  6. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1276

    A Guy said:
    LADYPINKtomato1 said:
    A CROWDED LIBRARY

    A guy is looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library.
    I honestly don't remember being in that library!

    A Guy
    Bill.. go take a quick nap... maybe things will clear up for ya....lol
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  7. Posts : 24,479
    Windows 7 Ultimate X64 SP1
       #1277

    I was talking to a girl in the bar last night.
    She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut,
    you 'd look all right."
    I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."
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  8. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1278

    Britton30 said:
    I was talking to a girl in the bar last night.
    She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut,
    you 'd look all right."
    I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."
    Ouch xD
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  9. Posts : 4,549
    Windows 8 - 64-bit
       #1279

    NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN

    Nobody teaches volcanoes to erupt,

    tsunamis to devastate,

    hurricanes to swirl around

    & no one teaches a man how to choose a wife.

    NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.
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  10. Posts : 2,241
    Windows 7 Professional 32-bit (6.1, Build 7600)
       #1280

    xD Nice one LPt
      My Computer


 

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