


23 Mar 2010

#1


Winston Churchill... A carrot ???
Did you know that Winston Churchill is a carrot? Here's the proof.
Let a=1 and b=1
Now b^2=ab (Equation 1)
Since a equals itself, it is obvious that a^2=a^2 (Equation 2)
Subtract Equation 1 from Equation 2 yields a^2b^2=a^2ab (Equation 3)
Let's factorise both sides of Equation 3 (a+b)(ab)=a(ab) (Equation 4)
Divide both sides of Equation 4 by the common denominator (ab) yields a+b=a (Equation 5)
Subtract a from both sides and we get b=0 (Equation 6)
If you recall, we set b=1 at the begining of this proof. Therefore 1=0 (Equation 7)
Now here comes the crux of the proof that Winston Churchill (hereafter referred to as WC) is a carrot.
We know that WC has one head. But Equation 7 states one equals zero, so WC has no head. Likewise, WC has no leafy tops, so by the same equation WC has one leafy top.
If we multiply Equation 7 by 2 we get 2=0 (Equation 8)
From Equation 8 WC has two arms, therefore WC has no arms. Likewise, WC has two legs, therefore WC has no legs.
We now multiply Equation 7 by WC's waist size: Waist Size=0 (Equation 9)
This means that WC tapers to a point.
Now for the colour. Take any ray of light emanating from him and select a photon. Multiply Equation 7 by the wavelength of the photon and we see that WC's Photon Wavelength=0 (Equation 10)
Multiply both sides of Equation 7 by the wavelength of an orange photon yields 640=0 (Equation 11)
Combine Equations 10 and 11 WC's Photon Wavelength=640
Therefore, any photon emanating from WC is orange.
Summing up, we have proved the following mathematically.
1) WC has no arms or legs.
2) Instead of a head, he has a leafy top.
3) He tapers to a point.
4) He is bright orange.
By all intents and purposes, therefore, it is clear that WC is a carrot.
Q.E.D.

My System Specs 

Computer type PC/Desktop
System Manufacturer/Model Number Dwarf Dwf/11/2012 r09/2013
OS Windows 8.1 Pro RTM x64
CPU Intel Corei53570K 4core @ 3.4GHz (Ivy Bridge) (OC 4.4GHz)
Motherboard ASRock Z77 Extreme4M
Memory 4 x 4GB DDR31600 Corsair Vengeance CMZ8GX3M2A1600C9B (16GB)
Graphics Card MSI GeForce GTX770 Gaming OC 2GB
Sound Card Realtek High Definition on board solution (ALC 898)
Monitor(s) Displays ViewSonic VA1912w Widescreen (VGA)
Screen Resolution 1440x900
Keyboard Microsoft Comfort Curve Keyboard 3000 (USB)
Mouse Microsoft Comfort Mouse 3000 for Business (USB)
PSU XFX Pro Series 850W SemiModular
Case Gigabyte IF233
Cooling 1 x 120mm Front Inlet 1 x 120mm Rear Exhaust
Hard Drives OCZ Agility 3 SSD 120GB SATA III x2 (RAID 0)
Samsung HD501LJ 500GB SATA II x2
Hitachi HDS721010CLA332 1TB SATA II
Iomega 1.5TB Ext USB 2.0
WD 2.0TB Ext USB 3.0
Internet Speed NetGear DG834Gv3 ADSL Modem/Router (Ethernet) ~4.0 Mb/s (O2)
Antivirus Avast! 8.0.1497
Browser IE 11
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Lexmark S305 Printer/Scanner/Copier (USB)
WEI Score: 8.1/8.1/8.5/8.5/8.25
Asus Eee PC 1011PX Netbook (Windows 7 x86 Starter)
OS Windows 7 Enterprise 64bit
CPU AMD Phenom II X4 3.0GHz
Motherboard ASUS M5A97
Memory 8GB GSkill Ripjaws DDR3 1333
Graphics Card PNY GeForce 460 GTX 1GB OC  Enthusiast Edition
Sound Card VIA High Definition Audio
Monitor(s) Displays Dell 19"
Screen Resolution 1280x1024
Keyboard Microsoft Wireless Keyboard 2000
Mouse Microsoft Wireless Mouse 2000
PSU OCZ Fata1ty 700W Modular PSU
Case ASUS
Hard Drives 1TB  Primary
160GB  Secondary
250GB  External backup for important files
Internet Speed 3 Mbps/768 kbps
23 Mar 2010

#3


Wow how times have changed, all that mathematics to see one of our former PM's is a carrot. I only have to turn the TV on to see our current one is a turnip.

My System Specs 

Computer type PC/Desktop
System Manufacturer/Model Number doofenshmirtz evil incorporated
OS Windows 10 x64
CPU Intel Core i7 5960X Extreme Unlocked
Motherboard Asus RAMPAGE V EXTREME
Memory 32GB (8x4GB) Corsair DDR4 Vengeance LPX Black PC324000 3000
Graphics Card 2x 4GB ASUS GTX 980 STRIX CUII
Sound Card Creative
Monitor(s) Displays 3 x27" Dell U2714H & 3 x 25" U2515H Dell
Screen Resolution 5 @ 2560x1440
Keyboard Surface Ergonomic
Mouse Logitech Performance MX
PSU 1500W ThermalTake Toughpower
Case Thermaltake Level 10 GT
Cooling Enermax Liqtech 240
Hard Drives 3x 1TB Samsung Evo 840's
Internet Speed 74 Mb/s
Antivirus Windows Defender, Malwarebytes Pro
Browser Firefox
Other Info WinTV NovaTD
HP CP1515n Color Laser
Sony BD5300S0B Bluray Writer
Microsoft LifeCam Cinema
APC 750i Smart UPS
23 Mar 2010

#4


Wrong: (a+b)(ab)=a(ab) (Equation 4)
Correct: (a+b)(ab)= a^2ab+abb^2 = a^2b^2
Another Edit: This is done in many forms to try and prove that 1=0, but it is at this point that I always see this failure.
Likewise, the formula "(a+b)(ab)= " deontes, that there are two answers to the formula in that there are two possible outcomes a+b and ab... thus two different answers for this fomula either subracting b or adding b. a will never yeild the same result unless b=0

My System Specs 

Computer type Laptop
System Manufacturer/Model Number ASUS G60RBBX05
OS Win7 Home Premium 64x
CPU Intel Core 2 Duo P7450 / 2.13 GHz (2.29 with Extreme Turbo)
Memory 4 GB PC6400 Hyundai (2X2) at 800Mhz
Graphics Card NVIDIA GeForce GTX 260M 1GB DDR3 VRAM
Monitor(s) Displays 16" LED Backlit
Screen Resolution 1366 x 768 on laptop 1600x1050 max res on 22" external mon
Keyboard Chicklet type backlit (white light) keyboard
Mouse Logitech G9 Laser Mouse 3200dpi and 1000 reports per minute
PSU 6cell Lithium ion { lasts 1.5 hours }
Case ASUS G60 Laptop
Hard Drives OCZ Agility 3 60GB SSD / 320 GB  Serial ATA150  7200 rpm
Internet Speed Comcast 8.60mb/s up  3.11mb/s down
Antivirus MSE
Browser Firefox
Other Info General midbudget gaming Comp. Low batterylife  High FrameRates  currently overheating problems :(
2nd Rig: Case: Rosewill BLACKHAWK Gaming ATX Mid Tower Computer Case
Mobo: GIGABYTE GA990FXAUD3
CPU: AMD FX6200 Zambezi 3.8GHz (4.1GHz Turbo)
Heatsink: COOLER MASTER V8 CPU Cooler
RAM: Patriot Viper 3 8GB (2 x 4GB) 240Pin DDR3 SDRAM 1866 (PC3 15000)
GPU: SAPPHIRE Radeon HD 6850 1GB 2
23 Mar 2010

#5


Quote: Originally Posted by z3r010
Wow how times have changed, all that mathematics to see one of our former PM's is a carrot. I only have to turn the TV on to see our current one is a turnip.
Isn't that an insult to turnips?

My System Specs 

Computer type PC/Desktop
System Manufacturer/Model Number Dwarf Dwf/11/2012 r09/2013
OS Windows 8.1 Pro RTM x64
CPU Intel Corei53570K 4core @ 3.4GHz (Ivy Bridge) (OC 4.4GHz)
Motherboard ASRock Z77 Extreme4M
Memory 4 x 4GB DDR31600 Corsair Vengeance CMZ8GX3M2A1600C9B (16GB)
Graphics Card MSI GeForce GTX770 Gaming OC 2GB
Sound Card Realtek High Definition on board solution (ALC 898)
Monitor(s) Displays ViewSonic VA1912w Widescreen (VGA)
Screen Resolution 1440x900
Keyboard Microsoft Comfort Curve Keyboard 3000 (USB)
Mouse Microsoft Comfort Mouse 3000 for Business (USB)
PSU XFX Pro Series 850W SemiModular
Case Gigabyte IF233
Cooling 1 x 120mm Front Inlet 1 x 120mm Rear Exhaust
Hard Drives OCZ Agility 3 SSD 120GB SATA III x2 (RAID 0)
Samsung HD501LJ 500GB SATA II x2
Hitachi HDS721010CLA332 1TB SATA II
Iomega 1.5TB Ext USB 2.0
WD 2.0TB Ext USB 3.0
Internet Speed NetGear DG834Gv3 ADSL Modem/Router (Ethernet) ~4.0 Mb/s (O2)
Antivirus Avast! 8.0.1497
Browser IE 11
Other Info Optical Drive: HLDTST BDRE BH10LS30 SATA Bluray
Lexmark S305 Printer/Scanner/Copier (USB)
WEI Score: 8.1/8.1/8.5/8.5/8.25
Asus Eee PC 1011PX Netbook (Windows 7 x86 Starter)
23 Mar 2010

#6


Quote: Originally Posted by Thorsen
Wrong: (a+b)(ab)=a(ab) (Equation 4)
Correct: (a+b)(ab)= a^2ab+abb^2 = a^2b^2 = (ab)^2
Which probably means He's not a carrot, but an off color Banana

My System Specs 

Computer type PC/Desktop
System Manufacturer/Model Number Real World Computing (Custom by Me)
OS Windows 10 Pro x64 x2 Windows 10 Enterprise x64, Ubuntu
CPU AMD FX8350 Vishera 8 Core @4GHz
Motherboard Asus M5A78LM USB3
Memory 32GB [4x8GB] DDR3 1600 MHz
Graphics Card Asus nVidia GTX750TIOC2GD5 (2GB DDR5)
Sound Card ASUS Xoner DG (2.1 speakers) + SPDIF to 5.1 System + HDMI
Monitor(s) Displays Acer G276HL 27", (DVi) + Samsung 39" HDTV (HDMI)
Screen Resolution 1920 x 1080 @60Hz + 1920 x 1080 @60Hz
Keyboard Logitech Wireless K710 & K400
Mouse Logitech Wireless MX Master & M570 Trackball
PSU Aerocool Templarius Imperator 750W 80+ Silver
Case AeroCool XWarrior Devil Red Tower
Cooling Stock CPU, Rear 120mm, Front 2x120mm, Side 2x120mm
Hard Drives Internal
Crucial 256GB SSD,
WDC WD30EZRX00D8PB0 3TB,
Toshiba HDWD130 3TB
Seagate ST2000DM0011CH1 2TB,
External (USB3)
Seagate Backup+ Hub BK SCSI Disk 8TB
2.5/3.5 Hot Swap Cradle, USB3 + eSata (client HDDs)
NAS
Seagate ST4000DM000
Internet Speed Orange Fibre Broadband 37Mb/s Down  9.5Mb/s Up
Antivirus Bitdefender Total Security 2017 Multidevice
Browser Chrome (always run latest NonBeta)
Other Info Also run...
Desktop  6Core 8GB  Windows 10 Enterprise x64,
Laptop  Quad 8GB  Windows 10 Pro x64
Netbook  Ubuntu Not used often ;)
2 x Nexus 7 Android tablets
Samsung 10.2" tablet + Keyboard and Logitech T620 Mouse
Sony Z3 Android Smartphone
HTC One Android Smartphone
System Manufacturer/Model Number Eloi and his Kitchen Table
OS Windows 7 Professional x64
CPU Intel core 2 quad Q6600 oc@2.8ghz
Motherboard Asrock Glan 4core1600 (sucks)
Memory 4GB 800mhz Kingston DDr2 (wants better..)
Graphics Card ASUS ATI HD5770 1GB(Gddr5) OC 900Mhz + 1300Mhz (Great)
Sound Card Creative Soundblaster Audigy SE 7.1 (Wouldn't recommend)
Monitor(s) Displays 24inch Samsung Syncmaster P2450H (Kickass)
Screen Resolution 1920x1080
Keyboard Saitek 3 Eclipse < pretty cool..
Mouse Logitech G500 (ex lachesis owner)
PSU 600W, unknown make yet decent performance
Case Unknown (Cheap thing, replacing)
Cooling Zalman9700LED + 1 High speed 10003200rpm 120mm < Great.
Hard Drives Hitachi 500gb 7600RPM SATAII 32mb
Unknown DVD drive, its haunted.
320GB Hitachi (Philips external)
1TB Store alu.
2x 500GB on Raid server downstairs. (Usually just hosts games and stuff, but its a "Guest" Pc too)
Internet Speed 1MB/s down 100KBs up
Other Info Server downstairs is an AMD Phenom X3 705E @ 2.8GHz with a mini ninja scythe cooler.
23 Mar 2010

#8


for all points and purposes, he might be a carrot, but not by this formula's setup

My System Specs 

Computer type Laptop
System Manufacturer/Model Number ASUS G60RBBX05
OS Win7 Home Premium 64x
CPU Intel Core 2 Duo P7450 / 2.13 GHz (2.29 with Extreme Turbo)
Memory 4 GB PC6400 Hyundai (2X2) at 800Mhz
Graphics Card NVIDIA GeForce GTX 260M 1GB DDR3 VRAM
Monitor(s) Displays 16" LED Backlit
Screen Resolution 1366 x 768 on laptop 1600x1050 max res on 22" external mon
Keyboard Chicklet type backlit (white light) keyboard
Mouse Logitech G9 Laser Mouse 3200dpi and 1000 reports per minute
PSU 6cell Lithium ion { lasts 1.5 hours }
Case ASUS G60 Laptop
Hard Drives OCZ Agility 3 60GB SSD / 320 GB  Serial ATA150  7200 rpm
Internet Speed Comcast 8.60mb/s up  3.11mb/s down
Antivirus MSE
Browser Firefox
Other Info General midbudget gaming Comp. Low batterylife  High FrameRates  currently overheating problems :(
2nd Rig: Case: Rosewill BLACKHAWK Gaming ATX Mid Tower Computer Case
Mobo: GIGABYTE GA990FXAUD3
CPU: AMD FX6200 Zambezi 3.8GHz (4.1GHz Turbo)
Heatsink: COOLER MASTER V8 CPU Cooler
RAM: Patriot Viper 3 8GB (2 x 4GB) 240Pin DDR3 SDRAM 1866 (PC3 15000)
GPU: SAPPHIRE Radeon HD 6850 1GB 2
23 Mar 2010

#9


Quote: Originally Posted by Thorsen
Wrong: (a+b)(ab)=a(ab) (Equation 4)
Correct: (a+b)(ab)= a^2ab+abb^2 = a^2b^2
Another Edit: This is done in many forms to try and prove that 1=0, but it is at this point that I always see this failure.
Likewise, the formula "(a+b)(ab)= " deontes, that there are two answers to the formula in that there are two possible outcomes a+b and ab... thus two different answers for this fomula either subracting b or adding b. a will never yeild the same result unless b=0
I don't quite understand the last paragraph... Are you saying that the two terms in (a+b)(ab) = ???? can only mean two roots? If so, there are many polynomials with a single root. Or more properly I guess two identical roots.
Actually Equation 4 is correct if a=b... The biggest error comes in the following step.
if a=b then ab=0 and equation 5 is derived by dividing both sides by zero, which is not defined.
Of course if a=b, equation 4 can be reduced to 0=0 which is perfectly valid, but applying undefined functions makes the proof invalid.

My System Specs 

System Manufacturer/Model Number Gateway GM5472
OS Windows 7 Home Premium (64 bit)
CPU AMD Athlon 56 X2 5000+
Motherboard ECS MCP61PAM
Memory 4.0 GB
Graphics Card Sapphire HD 4350 fanless w/512MB
Monitor(s) Displays VeiwSonic VX2035WM
Screen Resolution 1680x1050
Other Info Stock system except for the addition of 2GB memory, a Swann PCDVR 4 Card and a Hauppage dual HD tuner and a Sapphire HD 4550 video card
23 Mar 2010

#10


Actually, this is dividing by zero.
Which makes the world implode.
Thereby proving he is a carrot.
~Lordbob

My System Specs 

System Manufacturer/Model Number Hera
OS Windows 7 Ultimate x64, Mint 9
CPU Intel i52500k
Motherboard ASUS P8P67 Pro
Memory 2x 4Gb Corsair VENGEANCE DDR31600
Graphics Card NVidia GeForce N260GTX Twin Frozr
Sound Card Realtek HD OnBoard Audio
Monitor(s) Displays ASUS 24" Monitor
Screen Resolution 1920x1080
Keyboard Razer Tarantula
Mouse Razer Lachesis
PSU Cooler Master Real Power Pro 750W
Case Cooler Master Haf 932
Cooling Fans
Hard Drives G.SKILL Phoenix Series 60GB SATA II MLC Internal Solid State Drive (SSD)
SAMSUNG Spinpoint F3R 1TB 7200 RPM 32MB Cache SATA II
Internet Speed not fast enough

