Problem with locked EXE files

I have this problem where my .exe files get locked by explorer so I canot update programs. I can sometimes delete the .exe file and usually can always use unlocker. It's the same problem these people have had .exe files locking Problem with locked EXE files and asked in them if they solved it but was asked by karlsnooks to start a new thread rather than ask in there if they solved their problem. I have tried all the thing that were suggested in these two threads and neither seems to solve mine or their problems. If anybody knows why explorer would lock files randomly can you please tell me, thanks.

The problem is that an open handle to the file exists. You could use a tool like Process Explorer to show you who has the open handle, or Unlocker to close the handle and delete the file in one go. On XP systems I used a tool called forcedel.exe. I don't know if it exists for Windows 7 though.

As stated in my first post EXPLORER locks the file and I CAN delete the file using UNLOCKER.
An example is something like this. I use Internet Download Manager to manage my downloads and this get updated on a regular basis, so i start the installer to update my program and someway through the install it returns with an error saying 'the file is open or already in use'. So I have to use UNLOCKER to delete the file, 9 times out of 10 this works. When this does not work I have to reboot into safe mode or another OS on another drive and delete the file which so far works 100%. Some updates get applied with no problem but some don't. So far I have found no pattern to what gets locked and what doesn't. Some games get locked and some don't. Things even get locked if they are NEVER run by the OS, I know this as I tried to do a manual update of Alan wake game that hadn't been run since I rebooted about 10 minutes before and the installer said that AlanWake.exe was running or locked. It seems that sometimes as soon as the file or its containing folder is opened in explorer, it get locked.