To answer your question directly, the service you're looking for is the
Server Service.
I don't think, however, that your approach is the best option. Since the server service is a central point in Windows (and generally, built in services are poorly designed in regards to interdependencies between them), stopping it can result in unanticipated side effects. Also (and this is just an untested guess on my part), I don't think that the service itself takes care of unsharing invalid shares, but most likely it just relies on some configuration setup by explorer, for example.
Deletion of your unmounted drive makes perfect sense. Since it no longer exists, it's invalid to have it exposed to clients that might request it, the very same case when you delete a shared folder though explorer, it correctly warns you about the share and it too will be deleted. That's possibly because explorer recognises it, rather the server service realizing of the potential problem.
Possibly, the best alternative is to do precisely what you want to avoid, to recreate every share/permission/whatever each time you mount the drive. This only relies on documented and tested behavior, instead of some hacky workaround.
You can automate this process using a bat file, for example. It will invoke Truecrypt (which will ask the password in turn), then run "net share"s to recreate the shares, then "icacls" to rebuild the permissions, immediatly after the drive is safely mounted and available.
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