No Windows Updates, can't run SFC, and can't install updates via WSUS

Have a desktop here running Windows 7 Home Premium x64 with SP1. Noticed that updates were never being installed by Windows Update, despite it being set to automatic.

Tried running it manually by clicking Check For Updates, and got this:
Windows could not search for new updates.
Code 80004002 Windows encountered an unknown error.

Tried running sfc /scannow from an administrator prompt, and got this:
Windows Resource Protection could not start the repair service.
Tried it in safe mode, and got the same error.

Tried running WSUS Update Installer and got this:
ERROR: Determination of OS properties failed.

When I try firing up services.msc to check on Windows Module Installer, I get this:
An error has occurred in the script on this page.
Line 5
Char 5
Error Library not registered
Code 0
URL res://C:\Windows\system32\mmcndmgr.dll/views.js
Do you want to continue running scripts on this page?

When I click no, I find that Windows Module Installer is running and set to Manual. I cannot find TrustedInstaller in the list.

I finally tried dism /online /cleanup-image /restorehealth from an administrator prompt and got this:
Error: 87
The cleanup-image option is unknown.

I do notice that System Restore doesn't give me the option to set a restore point. I do realize that system restore would be pretty pointless in this case, as these problems have existed for a long time.

Any assistance would be appreciated.

Hi gelectr,

Partially agree with SIW, but i would like you to run a repair install.
Do you have re-install media
I'd like to know why this error occured, malware??

notes
DISM instruction is invalid for W7
W7 also hates being no:2 should be first boot OS

Roy