I have no hope in finding someone :(

[JordanJP]

Today I decided to check out eHarmony in order to find someone with whom I can be happy and have a relationship with. Unfortunately after spending over an hour completing the "Personality Quiz", I received the following message, much to my dismal :

(See Screenshot)


Needless to say I feel like there's no hope for me

Unfortunately due to my rather ugly looks and the fact that I suffer from social anxiety, finding someone is difficult, If not impossible for me. I'm 20 and have never been in a relationship with a girl before.

For those who have someone in their life, what does it feel like to have someone who you can love and know come home to after a long day etc ?


Jordan


PS

I apologize If I'm being negative and pessimistic, I'm just a sad individual, that's all.

 

[fseal]

Hmm, I was too busy with computers and such to even look up to see I was alone till I was about 28. Didn't get married till 32. Things don't necessarly have to happen right away...

 

[Phone Man]

Get a cute dog. They are chic magnets.

 

[Tarka Dal]

Ugliness is only a perception. I'm not that handsome myself but I found a real pretty wife, who loves me dearly and the same can happen for you! The key to being likeable and to get a woman is to relax with yourself and look for fun in your life. By this I don't mean make an idiot of yourself. Best of luck you've got years to go yet. I didn't find 'the one' until i was 36...


P.S :Those sites are just for sex magnets!

 

[Brink]

Hello Jordan,

I wouldn't stress over it. It's always when you least expect it and not looking is when you meet the right person. You're so young right now and have plenty of time to meet Mrs. Right. When you rush it, you end up meeting Mrs. Wrong.


For now, I would just say take care of yourself and get things (ex: financial, home, etc...) planed out and in order for your future.

P.S.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Each person has their own definition of this, so do not concern yourself about what "you" think you may look. If they don't like you for who you are, then kick them to the curb. It's their loss.

 

[thathagat]

start loving yourself....be comfortable with yourself....a simple change in perception often brings in great changes...people love you cause you are beautiful or you are beautiful because people love you....its just a matter of how you look at things

 

[Lordbob75]

All my relationships started as being friends.
Perhaps this made it harder to date, or easier, I don't know. But it is a good way to find out if someone really likes you, and you really like them before you commit to a date.
If you decide you don't want to date her, you still have a (hopefully) good friend that you can hang out with, without being overly awkward.

Perhaps this is easier to achieve in a school setting, but its worked for me.

(The one time I dated a girl without getting to really know her it died in about a week, though that could just have been her)

~Lordbob

 

[electrotune1200]

Sometimes when you're single all you want is to be with someone.

Sometimes when you're in a relationship, you don't wan't to be in one.

Just try to enjoy life as it comes, and don't worry so much about it.

 

[JordanJP]

Sometimes when you're single all you want is to be with someone.

Sometimes when you're in a relationship, you don't wan't to be in one.

lol thanks for that humor and thanks everyone. And thanks Brink for those encouraging words, no wonder you're the admin

 

[noobvious]

Jordan, at your age, try to relax, you have all the time in the world.

Remember, they'll unconsciously pick up on how you feel about yourself.....so if you're doubting yourself, they'll pick up on that.

So get your "shiznit" together....whether it means working out to build up your confidence, or spending time sprucing up your house/car/apartment, or getting some money saved up, if you feel good about yourself and where you're at, the ladies will come to you sooner or later....a famous man once said, "Confidence, is very sexy!"

 

[expatriate]

Others have said it, and I know all too well it is not much consolation, and even hard to believe, but you are young yet and there is lots of time. Yep, I know the sense of urgency, but think it through. There is lots of time.

I know at your age looks are really important - I think even more to girls than to the men (who will f*ck anything regardless!) but take notice of the couples that you come across that have stayed together for even 5-10 years - that really love each other, support each other, and look like they will for a long time to come. I think it'll be clear that studs and awesome girls are actually at a disadvantage there.

Make the choices that you know are right, then you will respect yourself, and other will respect you, and the chances are - no guarantees, but the chances are in future you'll look back on this period and be thankful that you found someone, and someone found, you because of qualities other than the ability to make amusing small talk and look like a stud.

 

[FZ21Z]

I apologize If I'm being negative and pessimistic, I'm just a sad individual, that's all.

"Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent."

~ Eleanor Roosevelt

 

[Cato]

The person you're going to have the most problems with in life is the person that you see in the mirror everyday. Learn to get along with that person first.

Don't let some site like eHarmony, or whatever, get you down. They could care less about you or your matchup. One of these days, out of left field, someone will come along and knock your socks off. In the meantime, enjoy life, have fun. Twenty years old is still very, very, young...don't be in too big a rush as that's what causes lots of mistakes.

All this is just my own opinion, of course.