Windows 7 Forums
Welcome to Windows 7 Forums. Our forum is dedicated to helping you find support and solutions for any problems regarding your Windows 7 PC be it Dell, HP, Acer, Asus or a custom build. We also provide an extensive Windows 7 tutorial section that covers a wide range of tips and tricks.


Windows 7: Jokes Thread 2

22 Nov 2010   #461
The Howling Wolves

Windows 7 Home Premium 64bit
 
 

Beer contains female hormones! Yes, that's right, FEMALE hormones!
Last month, Montreal University and scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain Phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.

To test the theory, 100 men each drank 8 schooners of beer within a one (1) hour period.

It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects, yes, 100% of all these men:-


1) Argued over nothing.
2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.


3) Gained weight.
4) Talked excessively without making sense.


5) Became overly emotional
6) Couldn't drive.


7) Failed to think rationally, and


8) Had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
22 Nov 2010   #462
Kari

 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by The Howling Wolves View Post
No further testing was considered necessary!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
23 Nov 2010   #463
lorddenis

 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by The Howling Wolves View Post
Beer contains female hormones! Yes, that's right, FEMALE hormones!
Last month, Montreal University and scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain Phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.

To test the theory, 100 men each drank 8 schooners of beer within a one (1) hour period.

It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects, yes, 100% of all these men:-


1) Argued over nothing.
2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.


3) Gained weight.
4) Talked excessively without making sense.


5) Became overly emotional
6) Couldn't drive.


7) Failed to think rationally, and


8) Had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
.

23 Nov 2010   #464
Bare Foot Kid
Microsoft MVP

W 7 64-bit Ultimate
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by The Howling Wolves View Post
Beer contains female hormones! Yes, that's right, FEMALE hormones!
Last month, Montreal University and scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones (hops contain Phytoestrogens) and that by drinking enough beer, men turn into women.

To test the theory, 100 men each drank 8 schooners of beer within a one (1) hour period.

It was then observed that 100% of the test subjects, yes, 100% of all these men:-


1) Argued over nothing.
2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.


3) Gained weight.
4) Talked excessively without making sense.


5) Became overly emotional
6) Couldn't drive.


7) Failed to think rationally, and


8) Had to sit down while urinating.
No further testing was considered necessary!
LMAO!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
25 Nov 2010   #465
Joan Archer

Windows 10 64bit/Windows 10 64bit
 
 

WHY MEN ARE NEVER DEPRESSED:


Men Are Just Happier People--
Your last name stays put..
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks and engines. A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
Your underwear is £9.50 for a three-pack.Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 24 relatives on 24th December in 24 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.


My System SpecsSystem Spec
25 Nov 2010   #466
beauparc

Windows 7 64 bit
 
 

"Morning Sex"


She was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual

soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only

the 'T' shirt that she normally slept in.

As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said

softly,"
You've got to make love to me this very moment!"

My eyes lit up and I thought, "I am either still dreaming

or this is going to be my lucky day!"

Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then

gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.

Afterwards she said,
"Thanks," and returned to the stove,

her T-shirt still around her neck.

Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked
"What was that all about?"

She explained,
"The egg timer's broken."
My System SpecsSystem Spec
26 Nov 2010   #467
Imperfect1

 
 

Just discovered this thread (believe it or not ) and I have to tell ya, you all have a great funny bone! Keep em coming --- they're great!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
26 Nov 2010   #468
DocBrown

Win7 Enterprise, Win7 x86 (Ult 7600), Win7 x64 Ult 7600, TechNet RTM on AMD x64 (2.8Ghz)
 
 

Quote   Quote: Originally Posted by Imperfect1 View Post
Just discovered this thread (believe it or not ) and I have to tell ya, you all have a great funny bone! Keep em coming --- they're great!



I thought that you would like to hear this from me and not from someone else.

I know what you are probably thinking.

This is supposed to be a secret, but the truth will eventually come out.....
Please don't think that I am gossiping.
Anyway guess who is coming very shortly ?


Scroll down……………………………..

















Gotcha!!!
Now get on with your work!!!
My System SpecsSystem Spec
26 Nov 2010   #469
profdlp

Main - Windows 7 Pro SP1 64-Bit; 2nd - Windows Server 2008 R2
 
 

My System SpecsSystem Spec
26 Nov 2010   #470
Bare Foot Kid
Microsoft MVP

W 7 64-bit Ultimate
 
 

Santa really gets around!


Attached Images
Jokes Thread 2-santapoops.jpg 
My System SpecsSystem Spec
Closed Thread

Thread Tools


Similar help and support threads
Thread Forum
Jokes Thread [4]
No sex after surgery ... A recent article in the Kentucky Post reported that a woman, Anne Maynard, has sued St Luke's Hospital, saying that after her husband had surgery there, he lost all interest in sex.
Chillout Room
Computer jokes!
Rules: ------------------ One joke per post No repeating of jokes ------------------ Il start: What do you call a computer with no graphics?
Chillout Room
Jokes Thread [3]
:note: continued from - https://www.sevenforums.com/chillout-room/106614-jokes-thread-2 ****** 22 ADULT TRUTHS ****** 1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is. 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you...
Chillout Room
IT Jokes
If you can read German, then you will appreciate: Die schlechtesten IT-Witze - Derber Humor ohne Gewähr | TecChannel.de
Chillout Room
Jokes Thread
Person 1:Knock Knock Person 2:Whos there? Person 1: Boo Person 2: Boo who? :huh: Person 1: ZOMG WHY U CRYIN??!? :p
Chillout Room
Jokes Thread
This is jokes thread! Post your best jokes! :D I will start first! :p A woman in the bar says that she wants to have plastic surgery to enlarge her breasts. Her husband tells her, "Hey, you don't need surgery to do that. I know how to do it without surgery."...
Chillout Room


Our Sites

Site Links

About Us

Find Us

Windows 7 Forums is an independent web site and has not been authorized, sponsored, or otherwise approved by Microsoft Corporation. "Windows 7" and related materials are trademarks of Microsoft Corp.

© Designer Media Ltd

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 17:16.
Twitter Facebook Google+ Seven Forums iOS App Seven Forums Android App